A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My problem is young girls like me, women my age pay me no attention.Hs age girls flirt with me all the time they tell me im cute, This girl was probably six was just staring at me one day i looked at her and she said i was pretty seriously. Chilldren especially seem to like me.It drives me crazy alot of women ikno have kids there kids are always crazy about be im not even a nice person. It doesn seem to matter even relatves like cousins like me i ahve a cousin i cant even lok at without her turning beet red her mother even told me she lieks me. Boys like me to but the girls seem infatuated. I get theese huge compliments from theese young girls. the say im cute or there friend likes me the Hs age ones are often more eplicite. My age women dont seem to hardly pay me any attention i never get compliments. Im in good shape and smell good wear nice clothes every time i ask a girl for her number i get it. I just usually never call i dont kno why.women my age constantly insult me they will joke and laugh and act like im so unattractive there are women that i look way better then sometimes jokingly i will ask them out and they will tell me to stop playing with them im joking any way but even still they think im foreal why are they so mean yet a six year old has told me she wanted to marry me.My standards are pretty high some guys will go for anything im very picky and only the most attractive women really atract me, woman that im alot prettier then tell me im ugly i dont get it all.any advice would be good
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 August 2009): The reason you don't have a girlfriend seems to be your attitude towards women and that your too fussy about who is good enough for you and who isn't!!
A
female
reader, pinktopaz +, writes (18 August 2009):
Why do you bother asking people out that you're not even attracted to? That's just weird. You said you're "not nice in general." That is why they make fun of you.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (18 August 2009): when i ask them they dont kno im joking. I will walk up and say hi im so and so ive seen you around would you like to hang out sometime, they say somehting like dont play with me its usually the unattractive ones the prety ones will give me there number or tell me they have a bf maried there phone is broke etc.aquintences theres women i work around they talk about me and make fun of me theese guys will iniate it and the girls just laugh and carry it on i dont think theese women are attractive at all but they seem to think they are and that im the ugly one,i suggested that one should go out with me and shes says "oh please like that would happen" even the guys think there ugly and talk about them when ther not around. theese women dont come close to my standards and women ten times more attractive have given me there number.Im not nice in general but people i like.thanks for the advice ill consider it.
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A
female
reader, pinktopaz +, writes (18 August 2009):
Like the others said, if you "jokingly" ask a woman out, you're making it seem like the joke's on her, of course she's going to say no and probably be irritated by you. When you do something like that, it seems like you're coming onto her like, "Hey I don't really want to date you, and I really don't think you're even that attractive, and I'm going to ask you out just to be an ass and do YOU a favor." That is what a woman would think of a guy who were to joke about going out.
Even if you were not a very attractive guy, yet you were pleasant, fun, and sweet...a woman wouldn't call you ugly. Usually women start calling you names like that because of how you're acting. If you go around acting like you're God's gift to women, then they will treat you like crap. We don't like men like that, and if anything, we usually take great pleasure in making a man feel like nothing when he think's he's God's gift.
So start to analyze some of the things you say to women. Sometimes you may not realize it, but maybe the jokes you make and how you're presenting yourself can be offensive to some of the women that you talk to. Also, don't bother getting a woman's phone numbers if you're not going to actually call her! What's the point? You now just wasted your time and hers. It's good to be confident, but don't be arrogant or a jerk. Women don't like that...that's when they start to belittle you.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (18 August 2009):
 For some reason, this book came to mind. I think it can be found for very little money now: http://www.amazon.com/How-Win-Friends-Influence-People/dp/0671027034/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1250564624&sr=1-1#
(you'll have to copy/paste that entire url, or search for "how to win friends and influence people" "dale carnegie")
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (18 August 2009):
I'm confused. You have listed rather conflicting observations about women your age and you:
1. They don't pay any attention to you
2. They give you their number when you ask for it
3. They laugh and make jokes about you
4. They tell you you're ugly even though you're prettier (?) than they are
Where are you interacting with women? Do you have any platonic female friends?
It seems rude to ask someone for her number if you have no intention of ever calling her. Maybe they know that you do this, and this is what "ugly" refers to, not your looks, but your manners? I know some people (men and women) who, despite their unquestionable physical beauty, are unappealing and unattractive because they have an attitude problem. There's far more to a well-rounded person than sheer physical appearance.
My advice is to look within yourself and ask whether the immature (young girls) are attracted to you because you are yourself immature? I'm not trying to insult you or be mean, but there is a quality about your writing that sounds like you still have some maturing to do.
Do you ever actually ask someone out in a normal, polite manner? After you've asked for their phone number?
Maybe you have a fear of being rejected, and that's why you're setting yourself in a position that you don't actually ever face it, yet you still resent the women for their reactions to you?
And finally, what are your 'standards' for an attractive woman? I fear you may be approaching women as though you were still in high school, and it's time to do it in a more adult manner.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 August 2009): ok sometimes young gurls like older men.. like me.. i personally like older men cuz they understand me better or more expirienced.. i think you also have to go out more if you r 21 or older you should go out clubin! you will meet someone tho! i hope!
best of luck!!
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A
female
reader, xcharlottex  +, writes (18 August 2009):
If you read your question, I'm sure you'll get your answer. You're a narcissist. The only reason children are showing interest in you is because they are naive and find it hard to understand the arrogance in people like you, which is a huge turn off for women your age. You want more attention from women your age? treat them with decency, if you think you're too good for someone don't f**k her about. There's confidence, then there's cockyness & you my friend are on a whole other planet.
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A
female
reader, jstdunno +, writes (18 August 2009):
Maybe you are an attractive guy but you just said you're not a nice person and maybe adult women can sense that.You also said you ask women out jokingly - not a good move. Maybe they think you're taking the piss , maybe you're being rude , most likely though they think you're not serious and are just trying to laugh it off. Women are psychic , they have no way of knowing you're serious.And you never call the women when you get the number. HELLO? They think you're hot , they want to go out and you don't call. They think your an ass.
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