A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:As with many people on here before me, I find I am suffering from a period of emotional torment to do with the girl I loved briefly for nine months and who broke my heart repeatedly because she was not ready in her own mind for a new relationship for several very good reasons.I have moved on, I've dated... I've met very nice woman and had lots of sex etc but at the end of the each and every day my mind still thinks about HER....I just cant seem to get her out of my head. What makes it worse is I see her regularly and she is just polite and thats it.... I want to know what I'm feeling but I think she's not interested, and why make the hurt aand longing worse??Will these feelings ever go away??? Or am I doomed
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female
reader, Ima FreAk!  +, writes (2 February 2012):
 Hiyaaa,
You're normal!
No need to seek a counsellor just believe in yourself and you will get over her.
The best treatment mate is time, you just gotta have patience and slowly it you will get over her. I know the thinking and the constant relapse and flashbacks of her may come into your mind a lot but you will get over it!
Love,
Ima FreAk!
x
A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 February 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks everyone for your answers :-)
it has been 9 months since we split, and they say its half the length of the relationship before you get over it. Its true the feelings have reduced alot, however I am finding that I'm still thinking of her too much for someone who knows that it can never be.
I just want to know if I'm normal or should I seek help from a counsellor..... again!!!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 February 2012): I know what your going through and it isn't easy, is it?Your story is very similiar to mine. I was dating a girl for about 8 months, but she couldn't commit to a serious relationship and I felt that I was doing all the work, feeling messed up, etc and realised that it was going nowhere.Anyway, I ended it in November and, like you, have to face her at work each day. I decided to stay polite and professional for the sake of our colleagues, bosses, etc. I make a point of avoiding her if I can and not make any small talk or anything to do about things out of work. Not always easy, especially if you've been close and there is still feelings there. But guess what? My ex has been instigating quite a bit recently..starting conversations, texting me and even bought me a Christmas present!!! Talk about testing me!!!Why? I wish I knew.Anyway, I would do as the others have suggested here - focus on yourself and concentrate on other things and it will get easier in time. Stay polite and professional with her at work otherwise any bad feelings, atmosphere, etc will be noticed by your workmates and that might lead to more problems for you.You will be able to deal with it - just takes time and a new outlook on things which will come to you gradually.Hope this helps.
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A
female
reader, natmarie +, writes (2 February 2012):
 No contact what so ever for 60 days . No emails, texts nothing. You will wake up one morning feeling ok. It works. good luck. :o) xxx
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A
female
reader, feeling  +, writes (2 February 2012):
Hi
Having a broken heart is one of the saddest feelings there is, but you can get over it, I suggest cut all contact, do not speak to her or try to make conversation this prolongs the agony, take up a new hobby or sport, go out with friends, meet lots of people, time heals there is someone out there for you.
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A
female
reader, bardia  +, writes (2 February 2012):
 God, do I feel for you! I was with my ex 15 months. Gave him body and soul. Now he thinks we can just be friends. We've been apart 1 month & no contact 1 week. I just can't bear it. I think about him constantly, even though I try to distract myself. I would die if I still had to see and deal with him on a daily basis as you do! I pray it'll lessen over time as they say. Get a counselor. Maybe even a new job so you can really cut contact, move on and heal. And go watch 500 Days of Summer on repeat because it tells our story of relationships with people who just can't commit. I'm so sorry. I bleed for you. :(
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 February 2012): Yes you can get over this if you stop seeing her regularly & dont have any expectations from her.
Its difficult but not impossible.
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A
female
reader, Ima FreAk! +, writes (2 February 2012):
Hiyaaa,
Sounds like you can't move on from this woman.
Sometimes things aren't meant to be so you must move on and face bigger challenges.
These feelings will go away if you try and is determined to get over her, because I've noticed that some people subconsciously can't get their ex out of their head like they always talk about ther ex which shows they still have a soft spot for them.
To truly ever move on from your ex is that you gotta be on good working terms, whatever happened between you and your ex is the past and try to look on the bright side of the future.
Ignoring her doesn't work, try to talk to her and try to be friends that way you know that she still is playing a part in your life but not a major one.
It will get better in time, you will get over this eventually but during the mean time you should do things that you wanna do like go nuts, go on holiday, rock n roll in your bedroom. Keep yourself occupied so you don't have to be constantly reminded of your ex.
I hope my advice helps!
What doesn't kill you make you stronger, stand a little taller! (Kelly Clarkson What Doesn't Kill You)
Good luck!
Lots of love,
Ima FreAk!
x
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