A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My kids father and i have been on and off for 5 years. The past 3 we were going strong, and never broke up until a few months ago.he filled my head with empty promises of marriage and more kids one day. he has cheated on me one but it was for a few months, and i found out thru snooping. he took the gril to the hospital room to see our newborn baby girl. and the after me having a c section he refused to stay with me in the hospital.i did cheat on him. but i was 16, and we just started out. i dont know he was so into me, once i found out how serious he was i changed.i was only for him.until he broke my heart again and left me and waited a week before getting a new girlfriend.i was devastated. i had a few rebound flings three to be exact.one was with his cousin,who was there for me n helped me get over my kids father more than he should have.but in the end none of which brought back the feeling i was looking for, thats when i realized that he was the only one for me.i told him what i did. he said he wants to work it out, but treated me like crap.he says a man can only take so much, and im more wrong than him. he doesnt work, or help with the kids, watch them when i go to work.. he puts his hands on me threatens me, breaks expensive things n my house. he moved his whole family in my two bedroom apt. me and my kids left. im scared he will hurt me bad one day, and i have no privacy in mu house cuz of his family. i dont know what to do. my heart is broken that he says he doesnt want to be with me, and he talks to so many other girls it makes me sick.he messes around with girls from our neighborhood n im embarrassed to go out side because everyone know what he does.but y cnt i get over him. now he wont even talk to me and it breaks my heart its like he doesnt know me. he wants to be out my picture, someone plz give me advice on how to get over him and y he is doing this breaking up our happy family and letting his fam do whatever they want.(he always take thier side)
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female
reader, galfrend  +, writes (1 September 2010):
l met up with what l thought was an awesome guy but later learnt that he wasnt.l went out with an ex boyfriend of mine during the first week of dating the above mentioned person.we did not do anything with my ex, it was just a simple outing.here is the thing l made the worst mistake of my life.l paid for it for the following 2 years of our relationship (with above mentioned).he would mess around with other women right in front of me and if l tried to say anything he would remind me of my outing with my ex all those years backthis guy does not care about you and the sooner you get out the better.if a person loves you they forgive you and move on.a man who loves you does not hurt you deliberately.often we stay in these abusive relationships because we keep hoping the person will change.well news flash they never do.you have kids so that should be reason enough for him to change and for you to leave if he does not want to change.learn to love yourself and once you succeed you will be able to walk away because you will know and believe that you deserve better.hang with good friends who wont judge you.find a counselor who will help you deal with being single after you have kicked him out.you will feel pain, anger, guilt and all sorts but after some time when you are in a better relationship or even single (but happy and stress free)you will thank yourself.you dont have any injuries yet l cant say the same for myself.l lost sight in my left eye and l wish l had left sooner.good luck dearlovegalfrend
A
female
reader, Oregongrl1 +, writes (1 September 2010):
Honey. we cant help you to get over him and make the pain go awaY! the pain is what keeps you around so you wont have to feel it! you are the only one who can do this and when you do climb to the top of that mountain you will able to breath again! but you have got to say no'more and mean it and deal w/ it and put you and your kids first. your kids alone will keep you busy enough! they need you right now, it's not their fault that he's an *ss. you can do it have them removed out of your house stay strong you will be amazed how strong you really are and when it is all over just the feeling alone of peace of mind! and serinty is good! you are so young take you and your kids and hold on tight and take them on the best journey of ya'lls life!!!Best Wishes 2 u all!
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A
female
reader, mizz.butterflies +, writes (1 September 2010):
 come on now.u cant get over him? this man treats u like crap,these are ur OWN words,sweety. I might be a little harsh on you but thats only because i dont wanna hear you sufferin with him. the man is a player.and not only that,he has no job ...basically he's a bum. why are u wasting ur time with him? Get yourself a new man and stop worrying about him!
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