A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:My, guy who i was with 15 years got married on me 3 weeks ago, HE CLAIM HE F UP, i stiil seeing him just like we are still together, but he go home every night to his wife, what should i do?, i still love him much. i truly beleive he is my soulmate still
View related questions:
soulmate Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, okland  +, writes (1 September 2010):
heya. you and this man were together 15 years ago. that isnt a couple of weeks ago. thats over a decade. tbh i dnt know why your still holding on to the past when he has moved on and so should you. you could have got marrried yourself and had children in this time but instead your waiting around for this guy. take control of the situation and move on. if he did make a mistake with this woman he married why should you be the one he complains to? why should you be the one hopefully waiting for him to leave her for you?
move on its been 15 years. xx
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 September 2010): He said he F'ed Up to get you off his back and to leave the door open for his to still have sex with you. Break off all contact with this guy. Tell him to focus on his marriage and if it doesn't work out to call you 90 days after the divorce is final - no sooner. When he calls, ask the question, if the answer is NO, restate the request and hang up.
...............................
A
female
reader, AuntyEm +, writes (1 September 2010):
 If he was your soul mate, he would have married you. Its time to get real and move on.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 September 2010): Girlfriend, it's time to move on. What kind of relationship did you have with him for 15 years if he decided to get married 3 weeks ago? I understand people make mistakes but this is big, it doesn't make sense unless he's been seeing this other woman all this time and you were the "chick on the side". It may not be worth trying to understand the reason for his actions but he made his choice so you need to let go. Letting go of someone you luv is difficult but the luv you think he's been expressing to you seems a bit suspect, esp. for him to have gotten married all the while he was supposed to be in a relationship with you. Doesn't sound as if he luv'd u as much as you seem to luv him. I know it hurts but he hasn't been honest with you. You totally deserve to be happy and with someone who will respect and luv you!
...............................
A
female
reader, confused1990 +, writes (1 September 2010):
I can see where you are coming from because you wore with him for so long but i would be thinking likeyou said, who is the one he is going home to every night? You might love him but you deserve to be in a happy and healty relationship with someone who is going to be laying with you every night.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 September 2010): sweetie i'm not in your situation and ofcourse i don't know the everything thats going on but i think you should leave it alone. ofcourse you love him alot and your heart is acheing for the return of his affection but he made his decision. He now "belongs" to this other woman whether or not either one of you like it. personally he made the choice to marry her and im sure if he truly really loved you they way you love him, he'd think twice before marrying her. you should'nt persue him unless he gets a divorce. Like i said before, no one other than the two of you know exactly what the situation is so this is one of those life experiences where you just need to look down deep inside and see if you want to be his one and only or if you want to be his side mistress where he's never commiting to you because he's "married". One important question you might want to ask him is "would you divorce your wife right now if i said i would leave out of your life forever and you will never see or hear from me again?"...see the answer he gives you and tell him its not theoretical and that you're dead serious.But in the end you should ultimately make the best decision for yourself because its your life and i hope everything turns out to be good for you in the end.
...............................
A
male
reader, Boombadaboom  +, writes (1 September 2010):
 that seems pretty messed up. Why do you behave nicely like you are still together when he betrayed you and chose for his wife? It might be that he is just using you, even if he doesn't realise it himself. If your love with each other is real, then he would not have married another. If he f'ed up then he should be doing all he can to get a divorce and be with you. As long as he's married to her, he'll never be all yours. The fact that he goes gome to his wife every night means that she is the one he wants to end his day with. In the end, he chooses to be with her. It seems to me that you're just his good time during the day, a bonus, an extra. Don't take satisfaction from that. If you do, then there's something wrong with you and you get a high of that. Don't mistake feelings you have from such a relationship to be better than a more true and fulfilling relationship. They give you stress and worries and it's not healthy overall. Settle for somebody that makes you happy in all the ways you need. Your real soulmate can still be out there, it's just not time yet.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 September 2010): You had 15 years with him and he never married you.wow and he married someone else and you still play hous how would you like it if would be his wife?that is not love to him its a game because you let him play you.wake up and move on but first of all you need to heal and true love will be there
...............................
|
