A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Okay, I realise this is a difficult sort of question to answer so I will tell you all the basics about me: I am 17 years old and have never had a girlfriend. This isn't exactly through choice, girls just aren't interested in me. I'm a quiet kind of guy and spend most of my time alone with a book. I'm pretty clever (an all-round A* student), I dress smartly, have nice manners and apparently remind people of Jeeves from Jeeves and Wooster.I always think I am too serious to be funny, yet somehow I make people laugh all the time (in a clever way not a goofy way). However I can be very uptight and I don't really *get* flirting or anything - actually I'm probably not that much fun to be around because I'm too uptight to let my hair down. If there was a party I would be the one standing at the back, too scared to dance (or the one who isn't there). As I said, I prefer to be quiet and would rather stay at home reading. I also love playing the piano and going for walks.You're probably thinking I must be shy, but I would say that I'm kind of in the middle - all the outgoing, popular people see me as shy and geeky, but I am quite outgoing compared to all the shy people. It's just that I'm not a very social person and don't have many people to talk to because I only have a few friends whom I have nothing in common with.If I had a girlfriend I would definitely treat her right, love her, care for her, cherish her and never press my advantage.I know one shouldn't generalise, but what type of girl do you think would like me? and how do i meet her?Thanks for reading all of that.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 February 2011): You are a normal guy. But the thing is that you analyze too much and what you need is practice. In the world there is a lot of chicks waiting to be met. The odds are in your favor. It's ok if you are shy. Not all the girls go for the loud mouths. Sometimes they even feel threatened by that. Like feeling too exposed and they don't like that. Dare to try and burn. Cause you will until you get better. Nobody can give you a formula on how to hook up with somebody. Through practice you will get it. But you have to take risks and get out little by little out of your comfort zone. I was painfully shy and quiet and I was waiting for a mother figure to lead me out of my shell. Then out of horniness I started taking baby steps and crushed, and burned, got up again, dusted off, etc. Practice and keep us posted.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 February 2011): hii...
first off, i just want to say that i think you sound like a GREAT guy. really, there is no certain type of girl that would want you; i would say you're a really good candidate for any girl who's looking for a good boyfriend--regardless of whether she's preppy, emo, nerdy, whatever.
as for why girls aren't interested in you, well...those girls just aren't the right girls for you. and the reason that you haven't met a girl who IS interested in you is just because it's not the right time for you to do that. i know that's probably not exactly what you wanted to hear, but it's the truth. honestly, though, i don't think you need to worry about it too much. for one thing, you're only seventeen. regardless of the fact that it may not feel like it, seventeen is really veryy young. you have plenty of time to find someone. for another, i would suggest that you don't go out looking too much. i mean, it's okayy to scout around and see what's out there and everything, but don't constantly go out "on the hunt" or anything like that. sometimes, the best thing that ever happened to you shows up right when you're least expecting it.
i truly believe that some veryy luckyy girl is going to find her way to you someday. she's out there somewhere, and when the time is right...everything will work itself out. ")
good luck, and God bless,
~sarsar~
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A
male
reader, dirtball  +, writes (21 February 2011):
 Cerberus is right, there really is no big secret. The biggest step is usually striking up that first conversation.
Every girl is different, and even within a "type" you will find variations in girl's preferences. If you see a girl you want to get to know better, talk to her. You might surprise yourself.
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A
male
reader, Myau  +, writes (21 February 2011):
 Im very simular to you, except I have a goofy sense of humour.
Didnt have a single girl in school and was very lonely. Wondered if id ever get one.
All types of girls will like you, if your a good guy, they will go for you. Perhaps you can work on loosing up a bit. Girls you see are just as nervous as you are and thus you are making them feel that you arnt interested.
There no perfect way or trick to get girls, I always recomend that you befriend a girl first and get used to being around them. It makes it easier to ask the one you like out.
Im not social either, nightclubs are really boring to me, but I try to go out on saturday night. You cant meet anyone at home dude ;)
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A
male
reader, Capri2  +, writes (21 February 2011):
I agree with Cerberus, you may be waiting for the right girl in the wrong place. I mean, the kind of girl who will like you will hardly be there in the party.
The kind of girl who will like you is that girl who will be standing at the back in the party (or won't be there).
There is another problem that affects guys like you. Girls aged 15 to 22 will mostly be attracted to the "bad guys". A guy that probably won't treat them as a princess, but that is certainly a sexually appealing man. And it's not only the way that guy looks. Part of the sex appeal comes with the guy treating them bad. And you are opposed to this.
These girls will end up realizing that such guys are ok to hang out with them when young. But they are not husband material, 'cause they don't look like maintaining a family. So as these girls grow up they start looking for guys more like you.
I'm not telling you there is no hope. It's just that your chances will start increasing as you turn 22 and older.
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A
female
reader, justjess +, writes (21 February 2011):
 "I know one shouldn't generalise, but what type of girl do you think would like me? and how do i meet her?"
me :P
I'll be serious now. I'm pretty much the same as you (shy and quite compared to the popluar kids, but more outgoing etc that the "quite geeky kids").
You sound like an ace person and the right girl will come along, as for where you can find them? well that depends, you say you like piano, is there a group near by you young musical people?
When I'm not out walking the dog then I'm fairly reclusive and spend alot of time reading lol, but if I had the urge to bother going out aand looking for a BF, then I would certainly be joining a few clubs etc and hopefully getting to know different people that way.
good luck :)
she's out there for you
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 February 2011): You are EXACTLY the type of guy I'd like to be with, but I just can't manage to find someone like you.
WHERE DO YOU GUYS HIDE ? ;)
Don't worry, you'll find a girl who will adooore you :)
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 February 2011): Hey mate I have no one interested in me ever either I don't play piano but I am also clever and outgoing Ish and I don't go to parties often but er. Tbh I believe that people like me and you will be the ones with loving wives who don't cheat and have a great job nice house and kids dw bout it looking at your age you are either in year 11 or college so uni is the place for you to find your soulmate dw bout it she is out there looking for you no one else YOU
Good luck hope this help
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 February 2011): Go meet like minded girls in book clubs or other such social outlet that caters to your interests. There are lots of girls around that like the same kind of things as you, lots of girls that are quiet and would rather sit down and read a book than go out and party. Just find those girls and remember you're the guy, if you like the look of a girl then it's up to you to make the moves. In other words you have to approach them and strike up a conversation and if you click you have to do the asking out.
There's nothing to it really, just go out and find places where people go that like the same things as you when you like a girl don't think about it just act. Go straight over and say hi, just start talking to girls you like and asking them out. It's a piece of cake and after a while it becomes second nature.
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