A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My friend has had 2 boyfriends for over a year now and its really not fair because I cant even get one. I've been told that I'm really attractive but guys just want to sleep with me and nothing else. And I dont sleep around, I make the guy wait a while but usually, he gets bored and leaves. I mean I haven't heard from the guy I'm supposedly "dating" right now in almost a week! I dont mean to be mean, but my friend is not very cute and both of her boyfriends are good looking and they are nice guys too! I am so jealous! I know I should be happy for her but this really brings me down because I have never had a stable relationship and I don't know why. I mean why I cant I even get ONE guy to ask me to be his girlfriend?
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 April 2010): You make a great point. I can see how this must be hard for you..this is similar to something I struggled with for a while. After some point in time I kind of lost touch of what was really important. Did you ever stop to ask yourself if this is what you really need? It's hard to find happiness if you look for it based on what others have. Frankly, it can get tiring. Like you said, you are not hard on the eyes. I get that. We tend to feel rejected when men go to others, especially when the other girl is less attractive. Just remember that beauty is in the eye of the beholder and happiness doesn't come from what you don't have. It comes from within yourself. Hang in there. If you have not figured things out by now, then just remember these kind of situations will only help build your character. Do you first, and then worry about other people. To be honest, it can be refreshing to have that space while you are this young. Use this time to figure out what you can do to improve yourself. It will be worth it in the end, good luck! :)
A
female
reader, angie?babe +, writes (24 July 2009):
Oh honey... Have you ever thought that maybe shes sleeping around??? And I know exactley how you feel I have a friend like that except that she does sleep wit tons of guys just to get them to go wit her... And I've been in relationships were they dont even notice anything but my looks... But I finally met a guy that we'll wait as long as it takes. It'll take time but you'll find a guy that will want you for you!!!!
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (25 March 2009):
 She must have a sparkling personality, quick wit, great sense of humor etc... Also she probably doesn't sit around moping and complaining and running down her friends.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 March 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks for all the advice but what really gets me is that she is a VIRGIN and both of the guys are ok with it, they are still with her and that makes me really jealous!!
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A
male
reader, Jason means Healer  +, writes (25 March 2009):
Sweetie! I can tell you why...
In your beauty, you're just too intimidating for a guy.
But, don't let that put you down.
Do quality vs. quantity.
Make a real play for the one you fancy.
But don't waste a nickel of emotion if he don't reciprocate.
Let that be your trademark.
Then you'll be a vixen.
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A
male
reader, tux +, writes (25 March 2009):
 Well if you wanted to, you can beat your friend and have 3 boyfriends, all you need to do is have sex with them. But I would highly NOT recommend doing that.
Just stay your course and find the guy who wants to know you mentally and not just physically. You are still young and plenty of guys just wish to get their jollies up into their 30's.. But there are plenty of guys that don't. Perhaps you need to broaden your horizons and stop going after the same kind of guy. TIP: don't go after the bad boy type..
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A
female
reader, superrrshawna +, writes (25 March 2009):
 I agree with Mr Me. Guys are super immature at that age. They want to hit it and quit it, and most are not ready to be in a serious relationship.
My advice is to keep your mind busy and off of the topic of relationships. Date around for fun, be the pimpette who has a ton of guys on the side, not the girl who is actively seeking a special someone.
Good things tend to happen when you least expect it. Until then, just have fun! If you haven't heard from that guy in a week, too bad for him! Move on to the next one!
Enjoy!
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A
male
reader, Mr Me +, writes (25 March 2009):
 First off, your friend does not have two boyfriends... she has two people she is involved with. A boyfriend (or girlfriend from my perspective) is someone you are loyal to and, when given that title, you are saying you are solely with. Therefore your friend does not have 2 "boyfriends" but rather has 2 "boys" that she's intimate with... that sounds like a horrible setup to me (sorry, but I'm a 1 girl, 1 guy kind of person)Now secondly to your problem: not being able to maintain a relationship when your boyfriend leaves you because you want to have sex. I hate to say it (since I'm also a guy), but the top thing on every boy's mind at that age group (18-21) is, "how do I get rid of my virginity?" Quite frankly, power to you to holding out for so long!!! You are showing those guys you want more than someone to have sex with... you want someone to make love with!You haven't had a stable relationship yet because the boys at your age aren't capable of it. Your friend hasn't had a stable relationship yet either (having 2 boys is not a stable relationship on either side), so please do NOT compare yourself to her. And don't worry about a guy asking to be your boyfriend... once you meet a guy that isn't all about having sex, you'll find the guy who will ask you to be a stable boyfriend/girlfriend with you.
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