A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Have been with my boyfriend six years, all is very good except one thing, his bad habit of telling silly lies. He knows how much I detest lying yet still keeps doing it, he doesn't lie about anything important so I don't get it, what is the point! I have asked him about it when I have realised he has lied but he seems to manage to talk his way out of it, like he'd forgotten about that, etc. Why do some people feel the need to embellish things or outright lie? Makes me unsure about our future together. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (14 March 2016):
 They are liars.
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (14 March 2016):
 Sounds like he could be a compulsive liar. If this is a deal breaker for you, then you need to tell him he needs to get help or else the relationship is over. Yes there is help available out there for people with these issues. It is part of his personality. He probably doesn't even realize most of the time that he is doing it. Maybe he has low self esteem and feels the need to lie. A therapist will get to the bottom of it.
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A
male
reader, Garbo  +, writes (14 March 2016):
 Lying is part of a compulsive disorder. One good article to look at is here:
http://goo.gl/Yt1W65
These lies stem from various personality disorders, and the text is nicely organized describing various types. I think you will be able to match the personality type with your BFs.
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A
male
reader, Denizen +, writes (14 March 2016):
 And why are you asking this question? You could ask him but of course you might not get a truthful answer. However you probably realise that if you can understand some psychological motive in him, it will give you leverage and a bit extra control.
It hard to change liars, particularly compulsive ones. What you do next really depends on whether his lying amuses you or annoys the heck out of you. If the latter is the case then you know where the door is.
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A
female
reader, Pureflame  +, writes (14 March 2016):
It's a silly habit a lot of people develop while growing up. Most people don't even realise that they have developed that habit. So, it's not really easy to tell someone not to do it. It's like telling someone you are around the block while you are still at home, you know. If it's not for big things, don't make it a big deal. Though, making him aware of the habit is something you can do, without nagging him about it. To avoid it from developing further. Think about it, and see if you can deal with it. And if you can't, see if he is willing to accept it and change. You can then decide what you want to do after that. It's your choice.Good luck :)
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