A
female
age
36-40,
*Bubbles
writes:I am a bit confused about this people say that the beauty is the eye of the beholder but in this world we tend to look at beauty in a different way; It's been said that people who are beautiful gets the best of everything good grades,raises/promtions,jobs/careers and spouses. How can this be so true if our society is judging everyone who is not beautiful or attractive it's unfair and it makes me angry and jealous. I want to have a good raise, promotions and a career in the future. I am sick and tired of people treating people who look like celebrities and supermodels getting the best of everything when people who don't have that appeal gets nothing and treated unfairly. I am angry because I hate this society so much I don't want to be here anymore. I am tired of trying to feel that I have to be beautiful like a celebrity or a supermodel to be accepted in this world.I feel like it's not about inner beauty, it's more of the outter beauty that we care about in this world.
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female
reader, BBubbles +, writes (9 October 2010):
BBubbles is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI am sorry if I offended some of you ; maybe it is me but this is how I feel you see I wanted to be a model but I'm only 5'2 1/2. Some of you guys seem to have a point. I am just angry and frustrated because it seems that I can't be what I want to be and do for a career.I am trying to cope with it and it makes me sad.I am trying to find other careers that will suit me better but for my height. Again I didn't mean to upset you people and I am not using this as an excuse either.
A
female
reader, LLindy87 +, writes (9 October 2010):
 dirtball makes a good point.
Beyond that...I think it might be your attitude that isn't getting you anywhere, if you are constantly frustrated with your life and how 'unfair' it all is. you must realize that most people feel this way. even 'beautiful' ones.
think about it,my best friend is gorgeous, and she doesn't get taken seriously EVER. She has to work twice as hard for people to take her seriously, because hell, she's just another pretty face.
So I completely disagree with you.
Step into someone elses shoes and realize that no matter what you look like, something is going to seem unfair. With myself, I'm slightly overweight, not fat but chubby, and I find it unfair at times that I can't seem to get into a good relationship. I did blame it on my appearance, but then realized it was my attitude when it came to dating.
I can name 7 successful not so 'hot' people for you:
1. (not wanting to speak ill of the dead)but..Michael Jackson, he was really famous yet he didn't even have a normal nose.
2. Marylin Manson (hell, the guy looks like satan)
3. Jocelyn Wildenstein (she is a celeb JUST FOR BEING UGLY...overdoing plastic surgery)
4. Michael Berryman (however, i feel bad saying this one since he has a condition) He is an actor.
5. DJ Qualls ...the actor on road trip, the new kid, etc.
6. Marty Fieldman (suffered from graves disease which gave him bulging eyes, he was an actor and a comedian)
7. Shane MacGowan (singer and songwriter)
do you know what these people have in common? THEY DIDN'T MAKE EXCUSES FOR THEMSELVES. They were good at what they did and because of that, they got where they were.
The saying "beauty is in the eye of the beholder" is because everyone sees different things as beautiful. My friend is dating a guy that I think is not hot at all or even good looking but she finds him drop dead sexy. I'm into nerdy guys who much of my friends would never consider dating.
I find a lizard adorable while my neighbor could find them repulsive.
you might think someone on that list I made is hot, I listed them so I disagree.
do you get the saying now?
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A
male
reader, Jmtmj  +, writes (8 October 2010):
 I'm gonna go a bit deeper than I probably should here..
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder means that different people will find different things beautiful and that the differences of opinion don't matter greatly.
How is that not true of society??
See what you're doing here is looking for something or someone to blame (other than yourself) for your lack of success. Its so much easier to blame others than to admit our own personal faults. Everybody has done this in some way or another... I failed... but its not my fault. Didn't get the raise or promotion that you wanted? Well it couldn't possibly be because you didn't work overtime, didn't put in the extra effort to move forward... its society's fault and all those damn pesky supermodels...
Society does judge women harshly compared to men... true... but slowly but surely men are being judged on looks a lot more too. But society is in the eye of the beholder also... NOBODY has a concrete idea of "society" so its really open to your own interpretation. Right now you view society much harsher than I view it. You know its silly to try to live up to what we think society demands, I know its silly... so why let such a silly thing control how you view yourself and your prospects??
Society barracks for the underdog... why? Because there are more underdogs IN society. The vast majority of people AREN'T supermodel beautiful... and even then, supermodels are judged harshly in other ways. Whats the two things that most people think about supermodels....? Beauty yes... but also STUPIDITY. Not all supermodels are stupid, but society loves to take people in high places down a peg or two... why do you think the news loved showing that one utterly stupid response to a question at a beauty parade a while back?? Everybody gets judged... or at least thinks they're being judged.
We can either soldier on and try our best to live the life we want to live... or we can let it bring us down, blame society and give up when we fail to jump the first hurdle.
Anyhoo.. Best of luck :)
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A
male
reader, dirtball +, writes (8 October 2010):
 I know lots of ugly people in powerful positions. Hell, Bill Gates isn't handsome and he's one of the richest men in the world. Sometimes you have to make it yourself. People who rely on their looks for everything end up failing in the end.
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A
female
reader, dmartin89  +, writes (8 October 2010):
 Beauty in the eye of the beholder means that everyone finds different things beautiful.
E.g. Some guys find skinny girls beautiful, like kate moss.
However some guys like girls who have a bit of meat to them.
Some people dont care about looks as much as all.
In some careers, sure, you have to be attractive. But in my career as a Hypnotherapist and Doula, its important that i'm intelligent and care about other people, it doesnt matter if im butt ugly!
Maybe you need to find a career where you dont feel that your looks are holding you back. That or just accept it!
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