A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I'm nearly 25 and haven't had a proper girlfriend. I remember back when i was 15 and my best mate got with the girl i liked and how terrible i felt. i moped for weeks. then about a year later - i was seeing a girl (if you can call it that) for about a week when another mate tells me he is now going out with her instead ( i know i was confused at the time too!) but the empty hurt feeling was there nontheless. But i thought to myself oh well, things will get better as you get older. The years have gone by and i feel so lonely. Friends and family just can't fill that hole. I have never felt so down in my life ever- esoecially considering i finally thought i was getting somewhere with someone i liked only to be shot down (i know it happens to everyone at some point but it's just such a horrific blow!). It sounds lame but i feel so desperate to be close to someone and for someone to trully care about me. I think i've got so much love to give but no one else can see it. I feel like i haven't had a hug in soooo long lol, and even that would just be so comforting right now. People say good things come to those that wait, but thats because they have waited and found. those that are still waiting would probably disagree. I've even tried dating sites but haven't had any luck there either. I'm not down and misserable around people though. Infact i'm considered the 'happy go lucky one' of the group but i quite often feel the opposite. There are people that are lonely all their lives. will i be one of them? it makes me laugh how there are so many unhappy, lonely people in this world just looking for love and yet everyone seems to stay single. It's like having a plant that needs water and a watering can lying right next it but with no one to put them together! The plant just has to hope it rains before it dies! Reply to this Question
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male
reader, singlesweetguy  +, writes (16 December 2010):
I know how you feel as I feel that most days. I'm a cashier at this supermarket and so many beautiful nice girls pass by me and I desperately want to ask them out, but I figure they might find that creepy. I'm a nice guy and I'm gaining more courage to talk to more girls. I'm 26. I hate the fact that so many beautiful nice girls are in dead relationships with jerks that cheat on them when they could be with nice guys like us.
A
female
reader, enlove01  +, writes (9 December 2009):
first the dating sites thing wont work, but you should try going out a lot to clubs. If you have soo much love show it, but dont be all up on the girl its soo claustaphobic! lol just be cool it dont a bit dont tell her that you love her a lot because that will mean you desparate to keep her. But you seem like a good guy, and if so let the time pass and youll meet someone, dont think about it too much though. Youll find someone.
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A
female
reader, : )  +, writes (4 September 2009):
You just completely read my mind. I feel the same way. Everyone around me is happily in a relationship and I feel so single and lonely. I feel you, I have so much love to give yet still can't find anyone. I wish life didn't have to be so confusing sometimes. For now though, I just keep living my life one day at a time, doing things that make me happy and hoping that someone will come along : )
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A
female
reader, tinati +, writes (18 December 2008):
Have you ever asked a girl out? Have you gone out on proper dates or did you and your girl just go out as friends? I have some single friends who just won't ask for the fear of hearing a heart-aching 'no' and then wonder why they were never considered? It may not be the same case for you. But if it is, then make a habit of asking. Yes there is a risk of hearing a 'no' but you may even here a emphatic 'YES'.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (6 September 2008): I feel for you man. I'm 26 and in much the same situation. Those in relationships who respond to my questions on this topic virtually always respond with platitudes. Being single is misery. I've come to the conclusion that almost all couples in a long term relationship usually forget what it felt like to be chronically single. They've blocked the traumatic experience out of their memory.
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A
female
reader, supermum +, writes (5 September 2008):
 When you find inner confidence, others will be drawn to you...its just getting that confidence that's the hard bit.feel free to message me.xxx
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A
female
reader, starismine1 +, writes (5 September 2008):
 If you always feel lonely, you will be lonely. You say you have friends who see you as happy go lucky, so you have friends, right? Why then feel so lonely? The person you feel you are inside may not be the person you project on the outside. It would be a very productive, informative thing for you to go up to some girl "friends" and ask them why they think you are single. You may find that the person you act like to women is not the person you truly are on the "inside". Also, how sexual are you with women? Do you try to have sex right away before establishing a repore with them and personality chemistry? It's hard to comment more without knowing the circumstances of a failed dating experience, so if you'd like to send me a follow up email about it, it will be easier to give you more opinions about what might be going on that's sabotaging your chances.
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A
female
reader, Shelljade41  +, writes (5 September 2008):
 Dear friend. There is no hole inside of you. You are full of love, but that love you have to give it to yourself first. Believe in yourself, accept and love yourself. Once you get there you will attract another whole and loving person into your life, not the other way around. To attract happiness, you must feel happy first. To attract true love, you must truly love yourself first. Realize what you already have in you and your life and be grateful for those.But really grateful, you know? Start now, look around you and count your blessings one by one. Are you in good health? Do you have some place to live? etc... you can find blessings in every single detail in your life. Focus on those, don't focus in what you think you are lacking. Be truly grateful each and every second of your life, learn to see yourself as the valuable person you are, feel that you deserve only the best. And the best will surely make its way to you, including that special person you dream of...Blessings!! :)
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