A
female
age
30-35,
*pendy
writes:Why does this keep happening to me? what is wrong with me? I can't keep anything down:( I feel so depressed, frustrated and extremely stressed out.I've been looking for a job for 3years now no luck..I've been on numbers on interviews where I'd think it went really well but they'd email me and say I wasn't successful.. I've been trying to hard to find a job.I can't keep a boyfriend. All my boyfriends broke my heart. I left college cos I found the course to hard, am starting a different course this year.I feel like I've been cursed. I feel like a big loser. All my friends are doing well with their studies, they have jobs and relationships. and I have neither.Am a good girl. Really sweet. Why is my life so hard.please help me understand..am only 21.. Why is this happening to me?Why do I feel like I've been cursed? I pray, go church but I feel God has turn his back on me:( Thanks..x
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male
reader, Arathon +, writes (27 May 2011):
 Hello Spendy,First off : You are not alone. I work for the Government and I speak to a lot of people just like yourself in respect of work. You are trying to gain work and that is really positive. Keep on with the applications. There are so few decent jobs going at the moment and you have just been unfortunate so far.As far as relationships go : You are young and one day you will meet someone who will bowl you off your feet. Think positive. You would want a partner who is optimistic and tries to see the up side of things... well that is what men want too. Try to stay in that frame of mind. Maybe you could look at free dating sites just to get an idea of what is out there but take the usual safety precautions IF you decide to try to meet someone off there. The suggestion to look is to show you how many others are in a similar position on that side too.Talk to your friends. Can any of them find you work where they are currently employed ? Also ask your Personal Advisor at JCP. Maybe he/she can find a placement for you to give you a bit of experience.Bottom line is you are NOT cursed and I am sure you are really sweet - Something positive will happen and soon. Just keep being positive !HUG
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (27 May 2011):
 Have you discussed with the doctor that you may need some sort of treatment for your depression?
It's possible you have a chemical imbalance in the brain that's causing some of these feelings. Medication may help.
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A
male
reader, Drew21  +, writes (27 May 2011):
 The job market is especially tough right now, and sadly... In many instances, the job is posted because "it is the process", but quite often they already have someone in mind for the position posted.
I've been on both sides of this issue. I interviewed for a gazillion positions. I always felt like the interviews went well and i was honest and true in them. I was always frustrated when i saw people who i KNEW i was more qualified then getting call backs, and then getting jobs. I could never figure out what was wrong with me! Whenever i DID have a job, i always wound up being the absolute best at!
It never made any sense to me, and always made me feel like a big loser.
Then, like magic, a job just plopped into my lap when i least expected it. From there, i've moved up the chain, and i now see how many organizations handle this stuff. Unfortunately it's not quite fair to the person who is submitting a resume green and without any prior connections in any way to the organization you are applying for.
All i can say is: keep applying. Don't give up, and don't be afraid of starting low if you see a chance for advancement further down the road, or a chance to be able to move to something you like better within the organization. Once you get in, and get your name out there and start to build a reputation, you'll have more room to move around.
Any form of education never hurts, either. A great thing to do while you're looking for work is to head back to school. I was doing JUST that when the aforementioned job just dropped into my lap, thanks to a connection i had made with a prof in school.
As far as relationships go: It does sound like you may be someone that people have taken advantage of in the past. Don't sit for that! You deserve to be happy just as much as anyone else does. Don't get discouraged by bad relationships. Just learn from mistakes and move on and try again.
Just be sure to remember that you deserve to be respected.
Hang in there and don't give up. Eventually you will find something that works for you and makes you happy in all facets of your life!
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A
male
reader, mrg123 +, writes (27 May 2011):
 Heya,Right, lets start from the top. Your not the only one who is finding it hard. I have been out of work for nearly as long as you and have had similar experiences to yourself. Especially right now with the economy as it is its really tough out there. All you can do is keep going and putting yourself out there. Again, I have been there (with girlfriends), I dont know the details of your past relationships but get the feeling your one of those 'too nice' types who will sadly attract people who will use you as a doormat. Thats their issue and flaws with them, not yourself. Maybe there are issues you need to address but this does not mean your cursed. What are you aiming to study? What did you study? You probably found the course before hard because it wasnt you. Your not cursed, your having a hard time finding your path through life which believe you me we all do in our own way. Your also not a loser. It's not that God has turned his back on you or that your cursed, its that your lost and looking for something which will help you find your way. I'm sure you are a good girl and really sweet, i'm not going to tell you just to look on the bright side and everything will be ok because there is only limited truth in that. What you need to do is do some soul searching, maybe take some time out, talk to those around you and try to find your way. It's possible and your only young. Good luck, let us know how it goes and if you need to talk, take care :)x
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