A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Dear Cupid,About nine months ago, my best friend of almost three years moved away. She is now living in a town that is about an hour away from mine. When she first learned that she was moving, she was completely devastated, as I was. We spent pretty much every day together for about two months before the move, and she was constantly telling me that I was her best friend and talking about how much she was going to miss me. I asked her to promise me that things weren't going to change once she left, and she swore that they wouldn't. For the first few months, that was true. We still talked all the time, and whenever we got to visit with each other and it came time to leave, we would both be really slow at saying good-bye.Then, gradually, things started changing. About eight times out of ten, she wouldn't respond whenever I texted her. The thing that hurt me most of all is that whenever we visited and then said good-bye, she had gotten quicker at it. I was the one holding on longest; I was the one crying. It seemed like she was able to just say, "I love you; bye," so quickly. On her MySpace page, she mentions this girl who is now her best friend. I guess I should have known that she would find somebody else to be best friends with, but still...it hurt me when I found out about it. I've tried messaging and commenting her to talk and maybe set up a time for us to get together, but every time, she hasn't responded. But I've seen on some of our other friends' pages that she has responded to their comments, and the other day, one of them said that when she texted her, she responded right off the bat.My question is, why did she promise that things would never change and then shut me out? What did I do wrong? I miss her SOO much. How can I get things back to at least a LITTLE bit like they were before? Please help; this hurts SOO bad.~Confused~
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female
reader, xxsecretsxx +, writes (3 December 2008):
 i kind of did the same thing with a friend when i moved.
We hung out everyday, she was my best friend but after I moved whenever we talked i felt like it was hurting me more. I made new friends and although i still love my old friend its hard to talk to her.
The first reason is she goes on hanging out with our old friends, and time changes people.
your friend might be trying to fit in and make sure she is going to do alright where she is. It's natural.
You'll find yourself also moving apart from her because you no longer will have funny stories to bicker about.
I encourage you to stay friends with her and have her come over every once in a while, your still friends, but she is adjusting to her new home and making new friends.
Good luck.
A
female
reader, Plexi  +, writes (3 December 2008):
 She had the intention to keep things the way they were that's why she said what she said. However when you move to a new town you need time to adjust.......make new friends so you're not alone.........maybe find a new job.........She might just be busy with life in general, be understanding and wait till her life calms down. Don't pester her too much cause you'll come off as needy and that will drive her even further. Why dont you make new friends as well? Let her see that your life hasn't stopped and what she's missing:)Good Luck
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