A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi I have seeing this guy for like 2 months now but i'm not sure if were a couple, so I striaght out asked him am I your girlfriend and he said that we were dateing. So I said ok dose that make me your girlfriend and i wanted a yes or no answer but he said "look I don't see anybody else but you and I don't sleep with anybody else but you, were dateing" What dose that mean ? What's the diffrence between dating exclusively and being someone's boyfriend or girlfriend ? If were only seeing each other dose that make us girlfriend and boyfriend ? He said he wanted us to get to know each other better and see what happens. Oh course i want that too but why can't he say i'm his girlfriend if he is only dateing me? Maybe he is lying and dates other people I don't know. I told him that if he wanted to date other people to let me know because i am not cool with that and he said ok you tell me too. Help i'm confused why can't he say were girlfriend and boyfriend ? thanks for any input Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Cherry_Blossom99  +, writes (19 May 2010):
 In addition to the other good comments from people, guys are very different in thinking to women. You will know you want to be with him and he knows, deep down he wants to be with you, but men need to make sure they are not rushing in. bit of a girly thing to assess but i know alot of men that do it. i was with my boyfriend for 2 months before he finally knew i was right for him, even thoguh we were acting like boyfriend and girlfriend. The male mind is a mystery at times! but dont worry, he does want to be with you, and only you, as he has told you!
A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (19 May 2010):
Don't ever force anyone to say anything. You won't get to hear what you want. He says you're dating, because at 2 months, that's what you're you're doing. You're still dating. He and you are still getting to know each other. You're both still working out what you want from each other. You've moved a little too quickly in trying to force an answer, and now you may have actually slowed it down. That last thing you want for him to start thinking you're clingy. At about 5-6 months, you can ask the question. But it's still a little too early, and you must not force the issue, or you will come across as clingy and he'll start to get really worried.
...............................
A
female
reader, Empressjai +, writes (19 May 2010):
 You're being too clingy and needy in wanting a title when you are only dating. 2 months is just the start of getting to know each other. You, yourself don't know if he is right for you because it is far too soon to tell and you're blinded by wanting this title of 'girlfriend'.
The problem with us women is that we don't listen when guys talk. You should listen to what he said...get to know each other and see what happens. That's dating, that is what dating is for to evaluate if the person is right for you. Maybe you need to sit back and relax and enjoy getting to know him instead of getting a heart attack just because he doesn't call you his girlfriend. It may appear to him that you are more focused on the title of 'girlfriend' than you are in getting to know him. He says that he's not sleeping with anyone else and instead of giving him the benefit of the doubt your allow your insecurities to rise up. He is being more realistic and you're being too idealistic and need to come down to earth.
Whilst dating there is no definition to start with and you seem to need this definition as if that is what defines you in some way. When you become a man's girlfriend comes by way of a conversation where you both feel you're ready to take things further and become a couple. You have not come to that point yet because that takes time. Why waste valuable time and energy fretting about what you are when you can be enjoying who you're with. The more you are needy and clinging and whinging on about not being called his girlfriend you may very well end up being cut off all together. What is your rush?
...............................
|
