A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Why can’t I get over this crush? This guy I’ve fancied for 3 years now, his done my head in. I’ve never had such deep feelings for someone before, this guy matches me banter wise, future hope, likes and he just feels right! We’ve spoke on and off for the last 2 2 and half years and my friends say is a (censored) I ask to meet up he ignores, he arranges to meet up then don’ reply to me for a while. (Yes his real not a catfish, I checked and stalked) his called me his online best friend and though his not lead me on in anyway, yes played a few games, I don’t care he feels like the one I’m meant to be with. My gut instinct is never wrong about things and I really feel he is the one I’m meant to be with... I’m not usually this invested in someone crushes usually last a couple months and I’m over it and no matter how much I try I can’t get over it. I had a friend talk to him to get the bad parts of him out but didn’t work he is literally Mr perfect! I’ve analysed pics and found ugly parts of him, pics and vids where his camp, spotted things where he don’t seem that bright, loads of negatives that should put me off but they don’t ??Now I think his seeing someone else and it feels like my soul is broken, I just want to get over this now, but can’t why am I in love with someone I’ve never met, why do I know him so well and I’ve never met him, what is his deal? What is it I can’t let go of?I did see a medium a few weeks back and they said this to me... I have strong day dreams/dreams that are very detailed... most of them will come true... Which leads me to believe that cause I see a relationship with him so vividly maybe that’s why I can’t get over him cause it will one day come true!
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best friend, crush, stalking Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (18 October 2017):
 Why not update your other post instead off writing the same post twice? We are all here to help everyone, we already have saw your post so update there so that we can give you further advice, you are obsessing with this guy and it is not healthy, not only that you are also ignoring any advice we spent our time giving you and asking the same thing again, did you not get what you wanted to hear? Do you want to hear the truth or is it you just want someone to tell you that you should keep fighting for him and he will be yours? That's the joy with strangers on the internet they won't be biased.
A
male
reader, jc2008 +, writes (16 October 2017):
Been there, done that. My advice to you, block him. On social media, mobile phone, online gaming etc. Seriously he is just a drain on your time. Ok, join a club, go on the meetup app and get away from the computer. Meet people in real life. Give yourself space to get over him and meet someone new. Even if it's a group of friends
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A
male
reader, N91 +, writes (16 October 2017):
 I don't understand how you have feelings for someone you've never met.
How can he be the one if he doesn't want to meet you? That in itself shows that he's not interested. Your behaviour sounds a little creepy if I'm being honest. Seeing a medium and therefore believing that you're meant to be together?
If something hasn't happened in 3 years then it's never going to. You need to accept this. Whether that be on your own or with the help of a therapist.
You've wasted 3 years of your life which you could of spent in a relationship with someone else yet you've used it pining over someone who doesn't care.
This man is NOT interested, give your head a shake.
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A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious +, writes (16 October 2017):
 Posting the same question twice in two days? Do you not think this is another sign of your obsession?
This is not love. You do not KNOW this guy. You are obsessed with a FANTASY you have built up around this "perfect" man. If you actually met him, chances are your bubble would burst very quickly as you found out he was only human and not the perfect creature you had put on a pedestal.
He has made it plain he is interested in you only as an on-line friend. That is a nice way of saying "I am not interested in your romantically". If he had wanted to meet up with you, he would have done so by now instead of dodging you so expertly.
He has a girlfriend now. Leave him to get on with his relationship, before you get yourself into trouble. Find yourself someone who actually wants to be with you. That is what you deserve.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 October 2017): Your infatuation is turning into obsession my dear!
You went to a medium??? Girlfriend, seriously?!!
Get a grip!!!
If a guy hasn't made a move in three whole years; you're chasing, and he's running. The opposite direction!
You want something so bad; that you're deluding yourself and creating fantasies. You really need to get some counseling before this turns into stalking.
The guy doesn't seem to be receptive, and you're calling it a crush. At your age, it's no longer a crush. Crushing is for teenage school-girls. You're a grown-woman.
If it's so bad you can't manage it by yourself; it's time to seek professional-counseling.
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