A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:why are some friends not happy when you share good news..? envy? jealousy? nastiness? are they "real" friends at all?I dont mean boasting or bragging.. or being " hey look at my news" just sharing that a happy event has occurred. Or should we never share good news with friends for fear of them feeling left out, sad or envious? maybe some friends need information filtered to spare their feelings. Recently I met a kind of well known person in stage theater I admire after a theater event, ( it was a happy few mins for me but means zero to others) and shared this with a long term friend, I did not boast, I am NOT a nasty or hurtful person, and I always listen to her news, she was disinterested and not at all happy for me, more like "so you met ..." with a blank I dont care face...and ive not heard from her since, ( been a few weeks) what I mention below happened with this friend. My life is simple and quiet and I have few friends, so this was a happy occasion even if it seems stupid to others.surely a friend would be kind of happy for you and not distant or not interested? just like " yeah ok" or unemotional blank face..are some people so jealous and bitter they cant even fake a happy response?is she even a friend to do this?id be happy for her, I would never be " yeah whatever".. even if i was a little envious..no nasty answers plseanswers appreciated
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female
reader, Dionee'  +, writes (8 August 2014):
 I think that perhaps your friend doesn't see it as that big a deal like you do and may or may not have been happy for you at the time however, her response was an honest one and reflected what she was feeling at the moment and very well could still be feeling now. Is it normal of the two of you not to speak that often? If not then I suggest finding out what is wrong if anything because it seems as though your friend may be having a few issues and is distancing herself because of them (whatever they may be). Just my opinion although we'll never know for sure. Good luck.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 August 2014): Some people are just born to be nasty. My suggestion is for you to ignore her. Let your accomplishments speaks for you. Just do things quietly. You can really please everyone. If you notice in every story there is always a villain. Its a part of life.
There are people born to annoy us. No matter how we try to be nice. Just continue to do good, i believe good karma will always follow you.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (8 August 2014):
 But maybe she WAS happy for you. Happy in the sense that she is glad that you are glad and that you had a good moment ,of course- ( why should not she be ). She just is not elated or thrilled or moved, she did not feel the emotion as strongly as you did. Probably you are into stage theatre, or into that particular performer, and your friend is not, so she can get what the big deal is ...just up to a point. She understands that you are excited, but she can't get excited herself about something she does not know or does not appreciate.
I don't think it has got necessarily anything to do with envy. I do not follow soccer at all, for instance, and a friend came to me all enraptured because she has shaken hands with a favourite soccer player, I 'd go " how nice for you " ( and thinking it, too ! ) , but obviously I could not feel the same rapture ,and I don't see why I should FAKE it.
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A
female
reader, cmarieky  +, writes (8 August 2014):
I think your friend either didn't believe you or it just didn't interest her. All things are not interesting to all people. She very well may be your friend but she doesn't necessarily need to leap at your news. A friend listens and give advice when requested. Other friends give money. Some even say they are friends when the tell the brutal truth. While others appear to be snobby and fake but say they are friends. It is quite petty to expect joy from your friend for your good news, what if your friend had a disastrous day. As long as this friend doesn't lie on you, betray your trust, steal from you, sleep with your partner, or other disloyal activity I think she is okay. Is she not a friend if her emotions remain neutral? Are you not accepting of her lack of relating to your happiness? Relax
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 August 2014): this is the poster...
just to clear things up WiseowlE I am not the sort of person to be "star struck" by celebrity,& the person I met does a whole lot more for the community than just theater. My friend I have sent a text to yesterday, time will tell if she replies.. she prefers text to calls.
but you are right, sometimes its best to celebrate alone, which is a true but sad fact indeed.. that your friends cant be happy so you need to be alone with your good news. No matter what the news is.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 August 2014): There is no explanation for your friend's reaction to your news that you shared with her. Perhaps her life has been very uneventful lately, and there may be a little envy going on here. Maybe just a little embarrassed by your
enthusiasm. If you know your friends, you know when something's wrong.
Don't always expect friends, family; or people in general, to always appreciate your gleeful moments. It's nice to share, but you shouldn't be as concerned about their reaction. It should not draw anything from your personal joy and excitement.
If you haven't heard from her for weeks, maybe you shouldn't connect your news with what is going on in her life.
She may have received bad news, or is undergoing something too personal to share. If it isn't usual for her to show envy toward you, or she usually shows a positive reaction for your good fortune; then you should know this is out of character. Maybe she's just not the type to be awed over celebrities. I used to live in a building that had suites leased for famous(and not so famous)actors who were touring and performing at the regional theater. I didn't feel much excitement about running into them; because I don't get awe-struck that easily. They'd get on the elevator and I treated them no differently than my other neighbors. They must have wondered who I though I was. A nobody like me. They were not in makeup, and in sweats or casuals just like me. Why should I be impressed? I was polite enough. I gave them props when I watched their performance. That's enough.
Sometimes we have to celebrate alone. That shouldn't make the blessing or the good news any less appreciated. It was YOUR moment. Cherish it all the same.
Check on her. Something is going on. I don't think it's your fault. An unemotional blank face might be a sign of something wrong under the surface. Investigate.
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