Why am I always the friend... with benefits? I want marriage, kids, to start a new family!

A female age 41-50, *lwaysafriend writes:

met him on vacation. a year and a half ago. he lives in the united states and i live in canada. immediately we had passion, fire and the relationship was heated. i didnt want to think so much about it, or even care to see him again. but we did. i traveled to see him in the states, two times right when we first met. then we traveled to different places and meet at destinations. i then again visited him in the us. he had some charges from the past which didnt allow him to come to canada. this didnt bother me at first until now. i have grown with this man and experience things i havent even dreamed about. our communication is amazing. and we care so much for each other. until recently. we planned to go once again to the tropical islands and i find out when i arrive there, he has a girl friend. he talked about her, how beautiful she is, hes never felt the way he has. I even asked him one day what if he thought i was beautiful. his response was interesting and not what i excepted. he said i was average, not like his girlfriend. every day he was texting her and tells me that he even asked her to join us. i was shocked. needless to say, there was no sex, he didnt feel like it was right to do that to her. yet here he is, sharing my room, laughing, dinning and amazing conversation ... well of course until he brings her up. unreal.... what did i miss. how did this happen. we even worked on his book he wants to write. of course he shares everything with me, but wont dare tell her about his book. he admitted he doesnt trust her. also even asked me to meet up with him again and maybe i can meet her and tell him what i think. you have to tell me this is a joke. i love this man and grew to love how compatitable we are. truly everything i want in a man. i am shocked, hurt and soooooooo sad. i truly thought he was the one. why am i always the friend.... with benefits that is. i want marriage, kids and a new start to a family. he knew this too.

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