A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Ok,Simple question. If you re torn betweet two men for marrige, One of whom Is pretty rich(can have laisure and relaxed life with), and the Other not so much(indeed may have money problem later), You like them both in certain way, Who would you choose? And Why?
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female
reader, dearkelja  +, writes (4 November 2007):
 After having money and not wanting for anything except LOVE, I would say that money definately does not make you happy. At this point I am looking for love. I can not tell you how many times I have driven by a little hovel of a house and thought how great it could be with the right man.
Sometimes when you struggle through life financially with someone you have a bond that is stronger and a life that is richer for all the struggles.
I know this doesn't answer your question but I would say that if you love "mr no money" more than "mr money" take love.
A
female
reader, samohir  +, writes (4 November 2007):
 why dont you leave the decision aside, till you meet Mr.Right with or without money? Isnt that cleverer?
Best of luck
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A
female
reader, JackieR  +, writes (4 November 2007):
 If i was in your position i would choose neither!!
You don't seem sure who you want regardless of money or lack of, you are not 100% committed to either men and to make a marriage work you must be committed!!
Marriage is very special, when two people are building a new life together, and they make vows which they should make a commitment to. You are making your decision based on money, do you really think that is enough??
Marriage is also bloody hard work, so if you are only marrying a man based on his bank balance and not because you love him above anyone else and always will, then you are in for a rocky time!!
Good luck on whatever you decide!!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 November 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank to all for answering. I ve rated all the answers excellent, since all of you have given me nice approach and direction. The problem is, I really dont know with who I fell more comfortable. It seems like I love them both, I know is silly and strange.With the richer guy I feel much,much comfortable, because he is more Self confident and is giving me more security, on the other hand with the other I feel more natural, like we dont go to expensive places but instead to some interesting cheeper places, parks and certainly he is better dancer than the first one,but his unconfidence is making me somethimes feel confused and unhappy.
As far as the issues I discuss freely with both,and sexual life is better with the richer, although i miss the games we play with the other guy..
he is not a gambler or waster of money , indeed he is engeneer, but is not well-off,at the moment that is.
Im relly in doubt, would have taken both if such option exsisted but now would have to choose among them.
It like Im having conflict of two positive issues..
Can I help myself somehow?
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A
male
reader, dodgeman +, writes (4 November 2007):
How can u choose between two different blokes over money.
I have been with my girlfriend for 11 months and i wish to spend the rest of my life with her. I dont care if she was as poor as anything. NOTHING will ever change the way i feel for her. I want to marry her and eventually have kids, i admit its a bit soon to say all of this at my age. but i know what, and that is her only.
You CANNOT put a PRICE on LOVE.
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A
male
reader, dodgeman +, writes (4 November 2007):
How can u choose between two different blokes over money.
I have been with my girlfriend for 11 months and i wish to spend the rest of my life with her. I dont care if she was as poor as anything. NOTHING will ever change the way i feel for her. I want to marry her and eventually have kids, i admit its a bit soon to say all of this at my age. but i know what, and that is her only.
You CANNOT put a PRICE on LOVE.
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A
female
reader, samohir +, writes (4 November 2007):
I would agree with.Mr.Phil that money does not necessarily bring happines, but Make the Life easier, thats for sure.
Vice versa, not having them, will certainly bring troubles in a relatioship(maybe not immidiately but later when planning family is to be an issue).
So,I dont know who You should chooce,Do you have any special feeling toward any of them or ? If you like/love them equally than be choose the wiser option... Its on One decision:)
good luck
P.S and I dont think you re selfish at all,many women will look at the man account first, even if they do not want to be honest to themselves:)
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 November 2007): I would say that love wins over money every time. So go with your heart. If you fall in love with the guy with all the dosh then fine, but if not you will be ok. I have never had loads of cash and have got by.
take care
xx
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A
female
reader, Cateyes +, writes (4 November 2007):
 Love is not about money, know that. Having that "extra" can be great especially when it comes to hard times. However, how you should be viewing this is, what do you feel when you are with each? You might "think" you love both, but honestly, your probably more facinated with being with both. Who do you feel most compatible with? Whom do you enjoy spending quality time with the most? Who do you feel most comfortable talking with about everyday problems and life in general? It's someone you know you can count on. Relationships are built on communication and yes, love. However, knowing and feeling that you have a trustworthy companion is also a key factor as well. Love comes in all shapes and sizes, and all walks of life....it's knowing that both of you are a give and take type person, and not a person who wants to suck you dry. Many people can be taking advantage of, and then later find out, it wasn't about the person deep inside they fell in love with, it was something material or what they could gain from it.
Stop thinking about the money, and think about who they are as a person....let this be your journey for your answer and in time...you will know.
Good Luck.
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A
female
reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (4 November 2007):
 Money is great, and a solid and secure future is always nice. It's wonderful to not have to struggle with money problems for the rest of your life.
HOWEVER. I think it really doesn't matter what the guy's financial situation is (unless your broke friend is awful with money, wastes it, gambles it, is irresponsible with it)... who do you love more? Who can you see yourself still laughing with and having fun with in twenty years? Who treats you well and with respect?
If you are going to marry one and not the other, try to figure out who will make the better husband. Who will make the better father for your kids? Which is going to help you around the house, bring you laughter and happiness? Who has less emotional or anger issues?
These are things you should take into consideration. The money is only a little part of your decision. If you truly love the one without as much money, go for it.
xxIndia
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A
female
reader, Emzy1591 +, writes (4 November 2007):
 I think your being quite selfish by choosing the men by the amount of money they each have. If it was me i would choose the one who i like more, if its the guy with lesser money then so what? If he makes me happy then thats all that matters. I think you should do the same rather than just choosing the rich guy because hes rich. I went out with a guy who was loaded and broke up with him a week later because he just didnt make me happy, i didnt start dating him because he was loaded, that was just part of him and in the end seperated us.
Go for the one you like best and dont let money be the deciding factor because that would be incredably shallow.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 November 2007): Money doesn't necessarily bring happiness, but it does 'grease the gears' and there won't be any worries about paying bills etc., assuming the one with money has stacks of it.
The one with little or no money may have other endearing features which far outweigh a lack of cash, but without knowing a lot more about both of them it's difficult to say which way I'd go.
If there's nothing to differentiate between them on the emotional front and all other things being equal, it's a bit mercenary, but I'd go for the cash. However, there's nothing to say the one who's broke might not win the lottery one day and be richer than your wildest dreams!
Phil
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