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female
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*ecca
writes: Help, I have only been dating my boyfriend for three months and he has always been very kind to me, but now that I want to end the relationship, he has changed. There are 15 years between us and although it bothered me, I went along with it. I tried to end it last night and he started crying and said that I better say goodbye because in 5 minutes he would go kill himself. He then threatened me that if I didn't stay with him he would make my life hard. So I told him I would try to work with him, but I know that I no longer want to be with him, what can I do? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 November 2006): Hello my name is Shatique the only reason why I'm on this subject because i want to but then again i don't wanna break up with him, Its like this when he ask me to do something okay i will do it but when i ask him to do something he'll either say alright and never do it just like lastnight i ask him could he please come to bed because tonight was my lastnight he say i'm coming to bed give me a minute still didn't never show up to bedso that pissed me off i try so hard not to break up with him because i love him so much and i guess he love me thats what he tells me and everytime he get drunk, if he see a girl he licks his tongue at her are either he'll go over there and try and look at her butt what can i do to solve this problem? Should i break up with him are just put up with his bullshitt?
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female
reader, kim21 +, writes (21 November 2005):
obviously this man has issues, you want to get out while you can go to a friends or parents house pack your stuff while he is out just think if the relationship is like this now what will it be like in another three months contact the police make them aware of the situation and get a restraining order get out while the going is good.
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A
female
reader, babyjessieb +, writes (3 November 2005):
Take a deep breath, think about the situation your in. Obviously your bf has some major death issues. Being caught up in a dead end relationship with a suicidal man is very dangerous. Whatever u do please DO NOT break up with him in private. Make sure alot of your friends,yours/his parents are there to witness his behavior. Sounds like you need to tell the police that he threatens his own life and it sounds like he might try to hurt you too. Don't take what he says lightly. Suicide is a very serious problem. Don't stick around for him to get worse. GET HELP FOR HIM.
You shouldn't have to carry this burden at all.
Oh and don't be affraid to tell someone for your sake and his. Good Luck! Be VERY carefull.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 October 2005): Believe me Becca, I know how tough this is for you. I went through a similar experience 18 months ago when I broke up with my ex, knowing that I did not want the relationship to continue, we'd been together 8 years.
He made all kinds of threats, physical and otherwise, and I found it very hard to leave. Eventually I confided in a very good and trusted friend and his advice gave me the courage to call it a day.
I know how scared you must feel, but you really must call an end to this. He is responsible for his actions, not you. He's using anything he can to keep you, which is abuse in itself, and trust me it will only get worse if you stay, even if only as a friend.
Please, please find the strength to get out of this now - you will find that doors open for you. Make the most of your friends and develop your social life as much as you can.
18 months on, I've never been happier and now truly value the freedom I have to live my life the way I like and see fit.
I truly hope this works out for you honey. Be strong.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 October 2005): Call the police and report his threatened suicide, and his threats to make your life hard. Or call the local suicide prevention group and report his conduct to them. He may need professional intervention. If he continues to bother you, see your solicitor, or public prosecutor about getting a restraining order against him. You are not his slave, and he has not right to tell you what to do, much less who you can see. Stand up for yourself, and get away from this guy as soon as possible. Warn your family members and friends so they will watch out for you, and be prepared to help you if he comes around, too. If you have an older brother, or a stern father, let them talk to his parents, or to him directly and assure him what will happen to him if he so much as thinks your name again! That may be a little old fashion, but it still works.
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