A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Can i ask a question here for other women please, i usually dress with jeans and a low cut top, or if am wearing a skirt i make sure my chest is fully covered, so i don't think i dress trashy at all tbh, i look around at girls my own age and are all wearing similar outfits. The problem is i was raised in church and there is a women around my mothers age that keeps telling me, wear less make up, don't wear tight clothes, don't wear this and that, and i think what is her issue! She is married but has clearly has a thing for a man at our church and he was talking to me on Sunday and starting rubbing my arm(not slezy just friendly) and this lady came over and said when he left,"church isn't the place to through yourself at men" but i wasn't he was asking me about college and my faith,nothing flirty or sexual at all. But this married women follows him around the church when she's ten years older than him then tells me to dress frumpy and wear less make-up. I told my mother who doesn't attend church and my mum said, that she would be the first one to tell me i was looking like a tart but I'm fine and if this women doesn't back off she will be coming next time to have words. Honestly what's the women's problem with me!!
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female
reader, YoungButNotNaive  +, writes (28 June 2014):
 It's obvious what her problem is. She's jealous because she thinks you're attractive dressed this way, and wants you to dress down so in her mind you'll be "less" attractive. She's also worried this man she's following around is (or will become) attracted to you.
She will never admit this, and there isn't anything you can say to get her to stop feeling this way, so it's best to ignore her unless she has something nice to say. Just remember this is HER issue, and it has nothing to do with YOU. It's likely she feels this way about any woman who is younger than her and attractive.
A
female
reader, tibob  +, writes (27 June 2014):
 Clearly, this woman is just jealous of. As a woman, i can recognise signs of jealousy. She feels insecure by your presence because you are younger than her and more attractive
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A
female
reader, maisy1 +, writes (27 June 2014):
Sadly being a true Christian doesn't stop people from acting in a way which is stupid, spiteful and obnoxious. The reason I stopped going to church was the number of people like you describe....so fucking self righteous yet pig ignorant. Tell her where to stick her opinions!
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (27 June 2014):
 I'd just tell her thank you for your advice, but I'm quite capable of dressing myself in a proper manner.
Some people are just meddlesome. And some are just nasty.
"kill" her with kindness and ignore her nastiness.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (27 June 2014):
 Next time she offers you unsolicited advice politely say, "thank you, I'll keep it in mind". Then ignore it and go about your business. Water off a duck's back, my dear.
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A
male
reader, Mark1978 +, writes (27 June 2014):
 She doesn't sound very Christian does she. Although to be honest, from my own experience of Christian Churches when I was younger, i am not too surprised at the bitchiness and jealousies that come with it. She tells you church is no place to pick up men but clearly has her own eye on church guy.
Simple solution - tell her to mind her own business. She is probably jealous of both this guys friendliness towards you and the fact you are young, attractive and have a great figure.
Mark
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