A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:What would you do if a guy texts you and never calls. He doesn't ask you out consistantly. For example this weekend he has not asked me out for a date. He doesn't ever call. I really like him though and when we go out we have a really good time. All the guys out there: is he not that into me or does he have a girlfriend or someone else he is more into? Why am I not enough for him?
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male
reader, eddie85 +, writes (26 February 2012):
 A guy that is into you, will do whatever it takes to stay in contact with you. I know I'd certainly do that for any woman I had feelings for.
Text messages are a poor way of communicating in my opinion, especially at the start of a relationship. They convey so little information and emotion that they are the equivalent of passing notes in class -- but even less effective. Do you call him? Have you asked him to call you? Have you asked him to go on a date -- where you can have a solid conversation with him?
Personally, when I first read your post, I felt that either he wasn't too much into you, uses you for sex, has a girlfriend, or is just too lazy to make an effort. At this point, the writing on the wall isn't too good.
I suggest pulling back a little. Make him chase you. I'd hate to see you put yourself out there for a man who can't meet you half way. It is best you find out now whether this man is a keeper versus investing more weeks and months of emotional energy on him.
Best wishes and good luck.
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (26 February 2012):
 Some people just don't give good phone.
but if he was asking you out a lot then you gave him a blow job and he's slowed down with his texting... I think he's as not into you as you are into him.
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A
male
reader, LazyGuy  +, writes (25 February 2012):
 Distance? Other means of communicating.
When you are in love with someone, you want to be with them ESPECIALLY in the beginning. Granted at your age you are not teens anymore but I get the picture that between dates, you don't really chat. Chat as in talking just to talk to each other, not to pass information.
I would agree that he probably ain't that interested. How does this level of communication compare with his normal self to others? If he never ever texts anyone else and he texts to you a dozen times, then for him that is a lot. Doubt it though.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 February 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWell this has been goingon for about 4 dates now and about a few weeks. I have not had sex with him however gave him oral sex once. Since then he acted even more distant I think..It was last weekend...this weekend he has not even asked me out...only texted on thursday to say "ahhoy thursday". Usually he asks me out on the weekends even if it is for somethig casual like hiking. Thta mhe may ask today for tomorrow. But now I am confused if things have changed (even him asking me out occasionally and texting) since it has slowed down. Or if things have not changed what do to.
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A
female
reader, Dear Mandy  +, writes (25 February 2012):
 HI
Some people just dont do well talking on the phone, and as technology has given us so many other ways to communicate, he chooses to text rather than talk. I find this frustrating at times as I like a good conversation from time to time. Next time he texts ask him to call you, if he dont reply I would not bother with him. give it another few years and people will be getting married via text messages lol
Mandy x
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A
female
reader, AuntyEm +, writes (25 February 2012):
 Sounds as if you are playing the 'fall back girl'. Someone to go out with if he's caught at a lose end. These kinds of people are fine as casual friends and you can have lots of fun with them as long as you follow 3 rules:
1)Never have sex with them (because they will be usung you)
2)Never fall for them (because they don't feel the same way about you)
3)Never give or loan them any money (because...you won't get it back)
Men only call and chase women they are really into, if he's being casual...thats how he sees you.
Good luck xx
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 February 2012): He just sounds alot more casual towards this than you.How long has this arrangement been going on and do you have sex every time you meet?
I would certainly expect phone calls sometimes rather than texts,especially when arranging a date, in fact I would tell him to ring.
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A
male
reader, Tom Obler +, writes (25 February 2012):
 On what you have written, my first thoughts were he is married. However, I could be wrong. His dates are not consistent or regular and he doesn't do the phone. This means red flag to me.
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