A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My girlfiend told me that she had slept with another guy in the past. According to her, she swore that nothing happened between them. Is it hard to believe that, even with the circumstances that were given. Ever since she told me I've been confused and enraged with her...... What should I do to clear my head of this obnoxious secret she kept for a year? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 October 2008): The problem with delayed truth, Is the person on the receiving end feels they have been defrauded.
All the kisses, special presents, that beautiful feeling you had as you lay on the beach watching the stars, the weekend away you saved for. Suddenly it all seems like its been recieved and shared by fraud.
Never ever delay the truth always tell the truth at the time.
If you want to continue you have to forgive her.
But you both need to study in depth the damage delayed truth and lies can do.
The good thing is your gfriend has eventually come clean, so she does have a consience, this is actually a good thing.
The bad thing is that the closet may still not be empty. Make sure it is before you proceed. You must make it clear you don't want this to happen again.
Good luck
A
female
reader, pepper27  +, writes (13 October 2008):
 Hi Hunny
Your g/f slept with a guy in the past, I presume you mean before you and her got together? If this is so maybe she did not say anything as it was in the past and she wanted to keep it that way. Also if maybe the subject had come up between you at some point love maybe she felt that if she told you, You would flip and get cross and angry and she didnt want this to happen so she just kept it to herself to save any argument..Plus to stop you from being worried about nothing as it is the past love. Its come out now she told you would you have been angry with her if she had told you before and thought less of her, This is probaly why she kept her secret, I hope you work this out hunny TAKE CARE WITH LOVE MANDY XXXXX
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A
female
reader, babomi  +, writes (13 October 2008):
 - take people as they are and not as you think they are
- relativize the whole drama, u don t have to judge ur friend s decisions
it s not your story, it s not your life, don t be so involved in another people s stories, let it go
you re her friend, a real friend gives support and not judgement
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