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female
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*rotica69
writes:dear cupid,Recently i have broken up with my partner of 22 years and have been contacting my ex-lover who which we broke up over 25 years ago we have now decided we want to get back together agian because we still love each other a lot. the only problem is she is married to her partner but no longer wants to be with her. she wants to be with me. also she live in the east coast and i live in the west coast thats 1500 miles away. we talk to each other everyday and email daily. in addition i am going to college and i have one more year before i get my degree. what should i do continue or break it off.
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reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (17 April 2010):
Until she does break it off, slow down. Tell her you can't be in a relationship until she breaks it off. It's not fair to her partner or you if she just uses you both.
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female
reader, AuntyEm +, writes (17 April 2010):
 I agree you should slow it down. You haven't really seen her much in 25 years and despite what is written in e-mails and said in phone conversations, people can be very different in the flesh. Until you spend a good amount of time with someone (and I mean recently as they are now) it's impossible to say that things would work out.
People often find out someone is right or wrong for them only after living together for a while.
Also she is married and even if she wants a divorce, it comes with baggage. Not sure if there are kids involved (even grown up ones) but it will have an impact of everyone.
I'm not saying don't follow your dreams, I am just saying apply a reasonable amount of logic and reality to the situation. These things always involve a price.
Go with caution!
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A
female
reader, QuirkLady +, writes (17 April 2010):
 I definitely think you should slow your roll on this one.
You just got out of a long relationship and your ex-lover is unhappy with hers. This could be love, or it could be two lonely people trying to restart a relationship for no other reason besides loneliness. You have to be sure that this is what you definitely want and not something to do because you don't want to be alone. If you two get together and then get bored in six months, you have broken up a good relationship and most likely uprooted one or both of you for nothing.
Slow down. Tread carefully. Take time to be sure that SHE is the one you want, and not just being back in a relationship. She should do the same. You might want to take some time to focus on yourself and enjoy being single for a while.
Good luck.
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A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (17 April 2010):
 You will have to weigh the pro's and the con's.
Do you want it or you think this is not a suitable time to have a relationship.
Or you could let Mother Nature takes its course.
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