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What is so special to women about having a baby?

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Question - (8 July 2010) 8 Answers - (Newest, 9 July 2010)
A male Nigeria age 41-50, *ruce lee writes:

[OP's original title]

You're all not going to like this...But I am a guy and I don't think there is anything special about having kids. I had a vasectomy years ago, and there's some lunatic woman I've met, who I'm having it off with, who wants a baby. She wants me to see a Doctor to talk about IVF treatment.

So, I'm mainly asking the women this question...

What is so special about having kids? Why is it so important to this woman? I asked her the other day why it's so important and she cried. She said it meant more to her than anything else in the world.

If we ever did have a kid, I would want a daughter because I believe life is harder for males than for females. But that's a whole different story.

Thanks for your support.

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A male reader, bruce lee Nigeria +, writes (9 July 2010):

bruce lee is verified as being by the original poster of the question

bruce lee agony auntI would like to thank you all for your answers. I guess you all were tricked by me. I made this all up. The part about the vasectomy is true. But the rest was all lies. I was testing out what kind of responses I would get from people. But it certainly has been an interesting talk.

Thanks.

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A female reader, loraemoon United Kingdom +, writes (8 July 2010):

loraemoon agony auntmen do not have it easier than women,where are you coming from on this, women feel the need to be a mother,its natures way for a women,to feel that life growing inside to feel that ultimate loveand affection for her unborn child, its the most magical thing in the world

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (8 July 2010):

If you were willing to let someone cut away down there with a sharp blade then I assume you have put some thought into it. If you don't want children then don't have them because once you have them you can't reverse the situation. It doesn't matter what your current GF wants, its your life and she should respect that.

I hear you on the part about it being tough to be a male. The discrimination against us is bad these days.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (8 July 2010):

Honeypie agony auntWhy do you think there are still people on this Earth? Why do you think the sex industry is booming? Because one of our strongest "needs" is to procreate. We would still do it even if sex wasn't fun.

Not all women wants children, not all men wants children. That is fine too.

But as a couple you have to be on the same page. Either you BOTH want children of you BOTH don't.

It doesn't make her a LUNATIC to want children.

And No, I don't think women have it easier, not by a long shot.

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A female reader, ctds001 United Kingdom +, writes (8 July 2010):

It's something nature makes us feel. From babies little girls are given dollies to care for.

In relationships we nuture our partners.

The miracle of having a baby is just so beautiful to us. And when we see babies we can't help but smile and want to hold them as they are minitures of us.

I always knew I wanted a child and would never date anyone who didn't want one! I became a mother for the 1st time this year and I am flowing with love for this baby all day, ever day.

I Just never imagined not having a baby.

Leave her if you do not want children, she wants to be a mum and will only resent you if you stop her.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (8 July 2010):

well i cant say the reason why i want a child some day is the same reason for this women but here is my take on it.

For me, having a child is the most beautiful thing next to sex with your lover (among other acts of love with your partner). I am not in a relationship with anyone right now, but I already love my unconceived child more than anything. This baby is a part of me and will be apart of someone i love unconditionally. To have a LIFE FORM that is part me and part of someone I love- well he/she will really be a unity of us both. Not just tied together, but literally something that makes us ONE. The idea of sharing and compromising morals, values, and interests in the up bringing of our to be child... yeah thats something.

=)

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A female reader, person12345 United States +, writes (8 July 2010):

person12345 agony auntSome men feel this too, though I'd imagine it's stronger in women. That's really what humans are built for. Having babies. You know, men are built for it too. Your bits are specially designed to deliver maximum pregnancy potency as well as to "scoop" competitor males semen out (that's why it's shaped like that). Most women I've talked to say it feels magical to have a baby, like the most natural thing in the world. I mean why do you think we have sex? It's not just for fun. It's a driving force behind a lot of actions. It's not really fair to call her a lunatic because she wants a baby. That's like calling someone a lunatic because they want to eat. It's a natural thing, what our bodies are built for. But like CaringGuy says, if she wants a baby and you don't, it will never work. Even if everything else is perfect, things would wind up ending badly. Plus, she has a biological clock to think of, she only has until around 45 to have a baby, and the longer she waits the less likely it will happen. It's not a requirement for anyone to have a baby, and there are women out there who won't want a baby either. You just have to find one.

And sure, some parts of being a man are more difficult, but being a woman can be pretty horrible. We get discriminated against, you know.

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A male reader, CaringGuy United Kingdom +, writes (8 July 2010):

It's nature. And you can't fight nature. It is built into most women that they want children. Fact is, if she wants a child and you don't, then you need to end it.

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