A
male
age
36-40,
*ony876
writes:Hi...I'm 20 almost 21 and and I have never had any girlfriend, nor have I kissed, hugged, touched hands... etc, etc...And it's driving me insane!... when i see the couples on the park i just turn around... I'm on med school, I speak 5 languages, I'm not that bad looking...I'm what you would call succesful... and now I feel like i expend all my teenage years doing things I wasn't supposed to be doing... I can talk to girls... but I don't like to speak much to them... for some weird and unexplainable reason they see me as their therapist or something... and I end up hearing about their BF, and stuff... I can't take it anymore... what can I do?... I've tried with poems (don't mind me... I've won several national writing contests...), flowers, not caring, bah!... I don't know what else to do... Thanks... cya
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male
reader, hurtandbitter  +, writes (12 September 2008):
I've been in your situation before. As much as I hate to say it because you might take offense, it's pretty simple. You're afraid. You're afraid of putting yourself out there. You're afraid of being rejected or getting hurt. Lack of confidence is also a consequence.You seem like a smart guy, do a little research to help you out with your confidence. You have to try get the girls to know that you like them. You have to be willing to let them know you like them and fight for them. The asshole-ness and confidence comes naturally with the need and want. Of course girls like Your high standards come only because you praise yourself so much, that's not a bad thing but while you do seem like the good catch you're only making it worse for yourself because while you do deserve the better Think of it as this way since I know it's happened to you before considering you haven't cheated your way through med school. When you have an important exam you have to study for or an important report you have to type up you want absolutely no one to bother you (unless it's your study group) because you want to be focused towards finishing it and using your fullest potential since you know if you do you will easily Ace the test or the report. Then someone comes bothering you or annoying you and you leach out at them or tell em off because they're screwing things up. It's the same kind of asshole-ness. The need and want for success and the willingness to challenge someone for that is a natural reaction and it's what women are attracted to most of the time.Of course you can also play the shy card. In some rare cases some women are attracted to the shy type but they end up disjointed as most shy guys lack confidence and are miserable for not getting as many as their friends and the women needs to have a lot of confidence in herself when it comes to meeting guys which is rare.As a last resort if this doesn't work out I can assure you, you will eventually find someone later on as girls tend to mature later on (and peak their sexuality and become more desperate) but you will have to deal with the sense that you might have missed out at early on.
A
male
reader, JesseENG +, writes (5 May 2008):
hey guy. i hate to say it, but most women enjoy a guy whos a little bit of an asshole. girls like the badasses. it probably sucks not havin a girlfriend, but be yourself. when a girl accepts you for you...shell be the right one. theres no reason to be fake and not be yourself. good luck man and dont lose hope. good things come with time.
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A
female
reader, °Ale°  +, writes (5 May 2008):
 I could say something like: Oh you hang in there! the girl of your dreams will come to you, and all the waiting will be worth it.
But then reality hits, if you're that GREAT of a catch, why aren't the chicks making a line outside your house? What are you not doing right?
Could it be that unconsiously you have an image of what you want in a girl and you are going to put yourself out there once you feel like you're ready?
Because that's another thing, if you do the whole going out or promoting yourself, will it really work? Get yourself ready for that part in your life and it will flow smoothly.
Buena suerte con las chicas!
Ale
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A
female
reader, a22jc +, writes (5 May 2008):
 you should go to places where the girls you are attracted to are, or even a nightclub or something, to get to meet lots of girls and get them intrested. try internet dating. lame, i know, but that's how i met me boyfriend& we are perfect for each other. so my answer is get out there& expose yourself to more women. hope i helped!
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A
male
reader, Danielepew +, writes (5 May 2008):
 Paisano, you're what they call a "nice guy" in English. You're doing MANY things the wrong way. Your question comes up very often and I found a link in which women tell you what you're doing wrong.
Here it is:
http://www.heartless-bitches.com/rants/niceguys/niceguys.shtml
Read it well, and change.
¿Alguna vez has oído el dicho aquel que dice que "mucha miel empalaga"? ¿Ya te fijaste que los mariachis siempre tienen chavas?
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