A
female
age
51-59,
*hippy2
writes: So lonely, Why can't I seem to find anyone to be with?It has been 3 years since my BF and I broke up. ( he cheated on me).I have tried to get over it but am still in counseling.I am outgoing with a great personality so my friends both male and female say. Right now I have some friends with benefits. Guys who we have a mutual understanding that it is just sex - no dating. This keeps me from going off the deep end of loneliness!My therapist and psychiatrist say I deserve better. I am happy that I am getting any kind of male attention.What am I doing wrong? How do I go about finding a new bf this year?
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broke up, cheated on me, friend with benefits Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (8 January 2013): Let's be realistic. You're a woman in your late 30s. You've lost some of your youth and beauty. This is not the time to say you "deserve better". If you find a man who is seriously interested in you, don't pass him up.
A
female
reader, AuntyEm +, writes (8 January 2013):
Is it a relationship you seek or just male attention? Because they are very different things and will shape how you feel about yourself and men in general according to your experiences.
FWB almost never leads to a relationship, afterall 'why buy the cow when you get the milk for free?'
I would also suggest severing all the FWB arrangements and show yourself a little more respect rather than just being a free 'ride' for Tom Dick or Harry!!(seriously it will crush your self esteem and identity as a woman)
Join a good dating site (I don't recomment Plenty of fish as there have been some awful stories of woe from many people on this site) or get out and socialise to meet other people...then you might have a chance of meeting someone who is interested in you for a lot more than a roll in the hay.
Anyone can find someone for casual sex, relationships are different as I am sure you know and take a lot more thought and time and effort.
Good luck x
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A
male
reader, anon_e_mouse +, writes (8 January 2013):
Get rid of all the FWBs (get some self-respect) and get out there on dating sites, clubs, seminars, dancing, shows, craft fairs, wine tasting, etc.
Any events are good for meeting people. Then you can talk to them about the show, seminar or whatever as a means to starting a conversation.
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