A
female
age
36-40,
*ilmisdarlin
writes:Dear Cupid,I am a 21 years old virgin, have a 22 years old boyfriend who is also a virgin. We have been dating for 2 years now. Right now, both of us are deciding to lose our virgin to each other as we love each other so much. But my problem is my boyfriend refuse to wear condom for our first time because he wants to make sure our first experience is the best. He wants to feel my 'virgin' and according to him, if he wear condom then the blood of my virgin will not be on him. But he promised would use condom after the deflowering. I'm scared because virgin man are easily aroused and he might cum inside me when he doesn't wear condom. But he is so confident that he won't cum inside me while deflowering me.What should I do? Should I continue? I really really want to have sex with him, but only if he wears condom...
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female
reader, Loah  +, writes (13 April 2010):
 Hey there,
Personally I don't think its an overly good idea for him to go without a condom for your first time. Safety comes first when dealing with sex and intimacy. And I believe that if you are not on birth control, him not wearing a condom could potentially lead to more than the two of you are willing to deal with, that being pregnancy. If he's dead set on going without, he had best be prepared to deal with the potential consequences of that. I truly suggest you refuse sex until he agrees to wear a safe. Good luck!
A
male
reader, Universe Man  +, writes (13 April 2010):
"The blood of your virgin will not be on him"?? Yikes. You know, not all virgins bleed. I hope he doesn't freak out if you don't.
You could go on some form of birth control, and if you use it correctly, the chances of getting pregnant are small. If you don't want to do it that way, then tell him you're happy giving him handjobs and blowjobs until he gets over it.
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A
female
reader, raiders +, writes (13 April 2010):
 For your own safety you should wear a condom. Not to hate or say your boyfriend is lying but what if he wasn't a virgin and what if he had STD this is what you should think every single time you have sex with a person. Think on you, you are responsible for your own actions so play it safe say no to the sex if no condom, protect yourself.
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A
female
reader, rambini +, writes (13 April 2010):
 if he loves and respects you he will respect your decision to wear a condom. he will not be able to pull out necessarily, and even if he can, men release pre-cum which they CANNOT FEEL so that will go inside you and is enough to get you pregnant. good luck and stay firm x
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 April 2010): i definetely would not count on him not cumming, after having got in the mood and everything. Just make sure you're on your pill.
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A
female
reader, Ilovemyoreo2010 +, writes (13 April 2010):
 i understand where he is coming from maybe u can talk to ur dr and get a diaphragm or some form of birth control because honestly if u plan to have sex u need it even with condoms so u dont have any accidents. i have a baby girl she is 2 months old and trust me its hard sometimes. its the last thing u want if your not ready!
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (13 April 2010):
If he doesn't wear one, he risks ruining your life.
If he's happy to risk ruining your life then he doesn't care about you or respect you.
Tell him it's condom or nothing.
Good Luck!! xx
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (13 April 2010):
 Better get yourself on some kind of birth control before you do the deed. The pull out method doesn't work for crap.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (13 April 2010):
Yes, you should. It helps prevents pregnancy, and protects against STD's, virgin or not. He will cum in you, because men have pre-cum which leaks out and has sperm in it. Stick to using a condom. And sex gets better after the first time anyway, because as you get more experienced, you know what you like more. If he won't wear a condom, then don't have sex with him.
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A
female
reader, Carrot2000 +, writes (13 April 2010):
 Your boyfriend has never had sex, so he has no idea whether or not he'll be able to pull out before he cums. Also, all women don't bleed when they lose their virginity, so that's not a reason to have sex without a condom. Even if STI's are not an issue, are BOTH of you prepared for an unwanted pregnancy?
I would hold off on losing your virginity to this guy. He seems more interested in making sure HE has a great experience and is not at all concerned about your well-being. If you do decide to have sex with him, you need to insist that he wears a condom, even if that means you put it on him.
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