A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hello, i hope you can help me. I have been going out with my girlfriend for 2 1/2 years now. I am 21 and she is 20. We both are in love with each other and is willing to do anything. I am her first guy she slept with ever, and she is my 5th. Since we started dating, we made love alot. Everyday, even 2 to 3 times a day. Now since the end of september, we havent made love since. I asked her if something is wrong, and she does not know. She just says she is never in the mood anymore. She insists she does not know whats wrong with her. I tried everything, massages, flowers, gifts. I have tried EVERYTHING!!! I hope you can help.... Please Help
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male
reader, SamuraiRick +, writes (17 November 2007):
 Here’s what happened:
She met this guy in September. She’s banging him! And since she’s never in the mood for you, this guy is wearing her out!
Okay so you might be thinking this is a big leap but be prepared to hear from her: “I just haven’t known enough men in my life to know if our relationship is good enough. I want to test the waters…”
The thing is you’re the First guy she ever slept with…and she’s still young. So even if I’m not right about the scenario I just put out, you’re going to have to live with the fear that she might leave you because of the fact that she just isn’t experienced. Now if she is a religious girl of faith, then you might have a chance she can stay true to you. Other wise, be on guard.
A
female
reader, Mistify  +, writes (16 November 2007):
 This seems to be a common ailment for some women - i know it is for me.
every situation is different though, so i'll try and answer best i can.
Was your sex life good up to September, or did it steadily decline up to September?
If it was good up to September, and just stopped all of a sudden, then she might have suffered some trauma - emotionally or physically.
This might take a LONG time to heal, and you need to be supportive.
If it was a steady decline, then maybe she is confused about her emotions.
My bf and i have the same problem. I'm just NOT in the mood - EVER.
We'll have nookie at least one a week, but even then, on some occasions i have to REALLY focus mentally, and GET myself there.
I know this problem is with me, and not with him, and maybe you'd do well in realizing it is also not YOU.
Is she stressing about something? College? Work? Family life? Friends?
Is she unsure of your relationship?
All of these factors may well play a role.
She should go see a doctor in any case - ONLY if she believes the problem is with her. I'm currently taking a herbal LIBIDO enhancer, and it does help - but only if i take it every day.
Try speaking to her, and hear about her life in general - not the sex.
You might be able to figure out from there what is causing her lack of 'mood'
If my experience is anything to go by, she's probably missing her active sex life, and would LOVE to be in the mood again, but she just can't, and she doesn't know why...
Good luck.
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