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We started dating and now he is acting weird...what can I do to keep him??

Tagged as: Dating, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (25 January 2008) 11 Answers - (Newest, 17 September 2008)
A female South Africa age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I met this guy in college. One day he asked me for a walk and he showed me around the campus and then we kissed. After that we started dating but he started to act realy weird.

He doesn't call me and he doesnt want anyone to know about us and he says he wants to stop seeing me because he doesnt want to see me get hurt because he thinks that i love him and he doesnt want to be in a relashionship with me (he is afraid of relationships)but i really like the guy and i dont wanna loose him. So what can i do to keep him?

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A reader, anonymous, writes (17 September 2008):

well if u really like him try to talk it over with him maybe starting all over with eachother.. but if hes gonna be like that dont waist your time on him =]] theres more where he came from!

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A female reader, Laura1318 Malaysia +, writes (27 January 2008):

Laura1318 agony auntI am not going to be judgmental like the others.If you like him , write or email him or call him on the phone .

This way , you can still be in contact with each other but remains invisible to the whole wide world. Your secret romance story , only the two of you know about it.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (26 January 2008):

I appreciate the fact that you 'really like' the guy but come on, dont allow yourself to be treated like that by any guy. If you dont have any self-respect then you cant expect anyone else to have any for you. He can lift and lay you as he pleases and he knows you'll always be there for him like some doormat. If he doesnt want anyone to know about you thats a sure sign to let him go. So do yourself a favour and forget about him, theres plenty of more fish in the sea, your young and you'll find someone who will want to tell the world about you.

Good luck

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A female reader, AgonyMalika United Kingdom +, writes (26 January 2008):

AgonyMalika agony auntMy advice is find someone else who wants to be with you not someone who was bored and saw a pretty girl and wanted to makeout.

This boy has probably had many one nighters with girls so dont take it personally, just dump him first and then he'll be in for a suprise.

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A male reader, Dangly United Kingdom +, writes (26 January 2008):

move on and forget him(at least pretend to). The end result will most likely be that he has realised what he has lost, be confused, and have a strong lust for you. Men want what they cant have, its how it works for women aswell. Show him what he has lost, and im sure he will come back. Otherwise you have moved on, and already doing better for yourself. Good luck x

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (25 January 2008):

I'm sorry but you're a play-toy for him.

He's not gonna wake up one morning and decide to take you seriously as an exclusive partner now that he knows he can keep you without doing that.

It's got nothing to do with what "hangups" he has, or whether he's a "decent" or "nice" guy, or whatever. He tested you by seeing if you would see him without his commitment, and you demonstrated that you would do so rather than not see him.

This is how the grownup dating game is played. Nobody is gonna go back and offer to pay $100 for something after the seller has already agreed to accept only $50 for it.

You can learn this now, demand more from him, and then call off the relationship when you probably don't get it. Or you can keep investing more and more time & emotional attachment into him for a while, and THEN finally force yourself to break it off later on when it's a lot more painful.

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A male reader, Somethingeasy United States +, writes (25 January 2008):

Somethingeasy agony auntWell you are probally going to have to have sex at one time if you plan on keeping him around. Thats probally why he dont want you around, cause from your post it sounds like you are not putting out.

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A female reader, Jmo United States +, writes (25 January 2008):

Jmo agony auntComing from someone who has been on the other side of that on several occasions, he probably has someone else, isn't really into you or is just a jerk. I should know... I am one. Either way, he can kiss your ass and you can find someone who will treat you right. Think of this as a learning experience. Next time you meet a guy, you'll know what to look for. I'm sorry, it sucks, but time will pass... I promise. -Jmo

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A female reader, nailglitter18 Iceland +, writes (25 January 2008):

nailglitter18 agony auntYou really like him, but he's just not that into you! you're worth more than that. Find someone who wants the whole world to know he's with you- someone who would hold your hand in public, and not be afraid to be in a relationship with you.

I always said I was afraid of relationships, but when I met my recent boo, it just happened..I couldn't fight it. I was terrified the whole way, but it just seemed so right.

If he IS that into you, then he'll come back. But till then... save yourself some humiliation, and move on.

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A female reader, XxAngelDust89xX United States +, writes (25 January 2008):

XxAngelDust89xX agony auntYou cannot make someone love you . If you really love him let him go if he comes back then its meant to be if he doesnt the its what will be will be.

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A female reader, sarah jane  United Kingdom +, writes (25 January 2008):

this might sound hard to you ,, however it sems like hes just used u as fun. he hostely doesn't respect you since ,, he dosen't want anyone else to know that you to are together. If i was you and loved him to pieces i would walk away now . so that i don'#t brake my heart any more.

but if u u fund him and had a talk with him, saying how u are still feeling with him and see how things go from then onwards. if hes not interested in u any more, i know that you could be better

best wishes

Sarh _X

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