A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:ok me and this girl have been friends all our life since we were little we are now both 14 and i think im falling in love with her, shes all i can think about, it upsets me to see her down and i want to be with her all the time, i honestly love her witha ll my heart. The thing is i know that if i tell her she won't beleive me as she gets picked on quite abit becuase she doesn't have all that many friends because she can't fit in. Lads have messed around asking if she'll go out with them annd one of them even started being friendly but it was all for a joke. Being as vunerable as she is because shes finding life hard as she can't fit in i thuink you can imagine hoqw upset she was as she thought someone actually liked her. I've tryed to help her through this and finally got her to start hanging round with me and my best friends who she gets on with. How do i tell her i understand why she won't beleive me and i don't want her to think im trying it on in order to upset her because i'd never do that. My bst mate keeps saying just come out and tell her but i have to bare in mind how she would take it. She admitted afew years ago she had feelings for me and thats one of the reasons she felt akward with hanging round with us but now we are all alot closer and shes more comfortable being with me. Please help me i really want to tell her.
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female
reader, Melanne +, writes (29 March 2007):
 I hear how much love you have for this girl and I think that is great. At the age of 14 you have a good idea of your feelings and what you want.You say that if you told her she wouldn't believe you, but you cannot know that because you haven't told her. She might act completely different than what you expect. It is obviously a fear to ask her out because you will be afraid of rejection, but then if you don't ask her out you will never know what she will have said.You sound such a sweet and considerate person you empathise with the way this girl feels and you have put your own feelings aside because of this girls feelings. It is quite obvious that your feelings are very strong and although she has been hurt in the past it is not in your nature to hurt her. She should know you well enough now to realise you are not joking with her. Also she will be able to tell by the way you ask her out that you are being serious. I am not saying ask her out, but if this is what you want then you should go for it. What would happen if years later you found out she had feelings for you, but you never asked her out? How would that make you feel? Yes it is scary asking her out it is a big risk, but isn't it a bigger risk never knowing? Better to have loved and lost then never have loved at all.All the best with this. Please let me know the outcome of this as I would love to know how you went on.
A
female
reader, Silence is Golden +, writes (29 March 2007):
Why dont you write her a letter completely from the heart about how you feel. I think that would work much better because she will then have time to think about things without feeling awkward or afraid of upsetting you. Tell her no matter what happens you will always be her friend and that you respect what ever decision she makes.
Good luck!
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A
female
reader, endlesssong  +, writes (29 March 2007):
 Don't just tell her how you feel, but proove it! Woo her and be completely sincear about it. Your friends with her, so you should know what she likes and how to make her see just how much you like her and that you mean it. There might be a chance she still has feelings for you too. I wish you luck!
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