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We had sex, and do these signs mean anything?

Tagged as: Dating, Friends with Benefits, Sex, Teenage, The ex-factor<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (2 May 2012) 7 Answers - (Newest, 3 May 2012)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Hi, so im 18.

I liked this guy which is also my friend... He used to be a womenizer but he changed,he kissed,but he said once he is more for a combination. My friends think he probaly likes me. So anyway we had sex.

He slept before with this slut, so basically she came took her clothes off,he took his ,they had sex and bye. And they never talk or go out.

But wiht me it was oppsite,so we go out,talk,etc.

And it was also romantic,etc. But for some reason i could see in his eyes he was nervous,does that mean anything?

He also kissed em and looked into my yeyes a lot,comparing to the slut.

Is there any chance he may like me and also does the bit staring into my eyes and being nervous mean anything?

Please help.

Thank you.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (3 May 2012):

I agree with the rest of the aunts. So far you are just as much of an easy conquest as the other girl is. A few hours of talking to him does not make a relationship.

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A male reader, CaringGuy United Kingdom +, writes (2 May 2012):

He hasn't changed at all. He's still the same, and all he's doing is making a mockery of you. And instead of seeing this, all you can do is call the other girl a slut.

Wake up. Stop calling the other girl a slut and actually look at what this guy is.

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A male reader, The Realist Canada +, writes (2 May 2012):

The Realist agony auntI'm with honeypie in that you shouldn't call this other girl a slut since you do know that you did the same thing as she did. The only difference is that you beat around the bush to get to sex and she just knew what she wanted from him and that was it.

From the info you have given it doesn't sound like he has changed at all. He got sex from you and the nervousness part was just that maybe he wasn't used to spending that much time with a girl before sex. Other then that he still got what he wanted from you in one night. One night is nothing much to spend with someone before sex. If you want to avoid players in the future then make them wait. If you two can have go the first 3 months minimum without sex then chances are he's not playing you but even then I have seen some guys go out with girls for quite some time just because they want to hit that.

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A female reader, So_Very_Confused United States +, writes (2 May 2012):

So_Very_Confused agony auntI doubt he’s changed. I am sure he will sleep with what he can sleep with. He can LIKE you enough to have sex with you and not like you enough to spend time with you….

He slept before with a slut… he is a slut and you slept with him without benefit of a relationship so technically the next girl that sleeps with him can call YOU a slut… stop calling names.

At least the girl he has just sex with doesn’t PRETEND that it’s more. At least she’s HONEST with him and herself.

IF he’s comparing you to the last girl he slept with, then he’s got issues that need addressing.

Just because he stares into your eyes and says the right things does not mean he’s that into you.

As my now fiancé said when I offered him sex with no strings attached (not to hook him but he was supposed to be my plaything) “I’m a single guy, you’re offering sex, what single guy in his right mind would turn down free sex?”

What kind of help do you want? Do you want us to tell you that he REALLY likes you and that you’re special? We can’t. He probably likes you enough to “hit that” but not more…

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A male reader, Sageoldguy1465 United States +, writes (2 May 2012):

Sageoldguy1465 agony aunt"Sounds" to me that he has you convinced that you are NOT a "conquest".... AND he'll continue to hang with you as long as you put out....

Do you understand that guys LIKE to have girls put out for them? .... AND, once they (girls) do so, we guys have NO MORE responsibility to be nice to that girl who put out for us??????

IF/when you figure THAT out, the "answer" to your submittal will be obvious....

Good luck....

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A reader, anonymous, writes (2 May 2012):

None of that means anything at all from a womanizer. He knows all the tricks if he's any good. By the way OP, why are you calling this other girl a slut? Womanizer is the male version of a slut you know and if he's still talking about her and comparing you to her then that's not a good sign at all.

You should have found out whether he liked you or not beofre you slept with him and it's more than likely he's just playing you too.

Want to know whether he likes you? Start dating him and wait a while to sleep with him again. If he likes you he'll stick around and date you, if he only wants sex then he'll start pressuring you to get that.

Staring, nervous, all those little signs are things I used to do. When you know what girls like it's very easy to fake serious interest, the only true test is holding out on the sex. I have never minded waiting for girls I liked, but if I only wanted sex I didn't stick around long if I didn't get it.

Oh and you may want to reconsider calling this other girl a slut, he's a far bigger slut than her and he doesn't get a free pass just because he's a man and you like him. A slut is a slut, judge one, judge them all or don't judge at all, because at the end of the day maybe he's telling other girls you're the slut.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (2 May 2012):

Honeypie agony auntI think you should stop calling the other chick he slept with a slut.

From what you describe it seems you are in a FWB, nothing more, nothing less.

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