A
male
age
36-40,
*hor23
writes:Hey, i have been with my girlfriend for a little over 2 years now and when we started dating she was a virgin and i wasnt and eventually we ended up having sex and obviously i was the one to take her virginity. My question is and something that has really rattled my cage when we first started having sex we always used condoms and it never felt good for her and she would always say "lets not use a condom" and when we started not to it felt great for her and i of course...to me it is odd for someone who was a "virgin" before me to be so anti-condoms and then be so pleased when not used....am i being paranoid or should i raise question of her virginity before me???
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2010): It does seem like she was a virgin. Don't fall for this lie.....
A
female
reader, cocoqueen88 +, writes (5 August 2010):
 maybe she wants a baby... wrap it up honey it has nothing to do with virginity.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 August 2010): The question isn't "Was she really a virgin?" The question is are you ready to be a father? Do you care whether you end up with an STD? If you did, you wouldn't be having sex without a condom. You admit you aren't sure you trust her, and yet you keep having sex with her. Nobody is making you do that but yourself. YOU are responsible for your own actions and the consequences. Maybe it feels better for her, but lots of women have heard this line from men and the SMART ones know you still insist on a condom. Wake up, buddy - if there is still time.
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A
male
reader, daletom +, writes (5 August 2010):
If anything, her behavior may reinforce her claim of being a virgin. Judging by your age, she probably waited and passed up a few opportunities to have sex before meeting you. That indicates that she values sex as something special and valuable, probably a very intimate activity between two particular people.
Many people (both men and women) consider natural, naked-genital, no condom sex to be emotionally more intimate than sex with condoms - regardless of the physical sensations. She waited because she considered sex to be a very special, intimate thing and now she wants it as intimate as possible.
Please . . . make sure you are dealing responsibly with the problems of pregnancy and STD's. Don't let people tell you that "condoms" is the ONLY answer - in many cases I don't think it's even a very good answer - but these are VERY REAL problems that you must consider.
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A
female
reader, Miamine  +, writes (4 August 2010):
 Hahaha.. strontiumdog good answer... I keep feeling that something is wrong with me because I'm 40 and no longer a virgin..
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A
male
reader, escribanus  +, writes (4 August 2010):
 Who cares about a simple piece of membrane. Do you love each other?, do you like each other? There is the big deal.
Anyway, believe her.
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A
female
reader, Romani +, writes (4 August 2010):
condoms are irritating to the vaginal wall for some women -thts probably why they hurt her!
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A
female
reader, aphexinfinite +, writes (4 August 2010):
 omg i dont see how using and not using a condom is relevant to her being a virgin what is this so many people on about virgins but then its ok for them not to be one what is the difference or am i missing something ? perhaps she ddnt want to get pregnant! but the actual feel from not using is better than using all women come to a point were they take a chance for the real thing i hope shes on the pill or something dont want her having a baby whilst your having a crisis on her being a virgin just because shes likes it without a condom ! seriously have you read what you wrote makes no sense whatso ever. every person in the world prefers no condoms but its stops you getting pregnant and bringing a poor child into the world when people are not ready to have such a big commitment! think you need a reality check! good luck
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 August 2010): Some women like the feel and get satisfied with comdoms other women dont like the feel nor do they get satisfied with condoms. I dont think your gf was lieing about her virginity. I never liked the feel of condoms so i preffered birth control but now ive been married for 3 yrs and dont have to worry about either of them
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A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (4 August 2010):
 its her business who she loses her virginity to and if there was no blood during her first time then my friend she wasnt a virgin. And if things felt a lil too open down there then someone wasnt a virgin. Let me backtrack, if none of those things happened then u werent her first time..either A. she lied, or B. lied and cheated on u. Lets hope its A.
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