A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I've just found out that a colleague of mine with whom I used to work a some 4 years ago had a mortal car accident this morning while he was driving to work: the road was icy, he lost control of his car and crashed against a tree- he died.We weren't close friends or anything, I just remember him as a really nice, fun and talented guy- I was was saying, we weren't friends, but his death struck me like you have no idea. I mean, how crazy is it that you get up in the morning, get in your car to go to work and then you never make it to work because you die. How awful is this? I can't get over it. I mean, it could have been me, it could have been any of us. It's so scary thinking that today might be your last day alive, that you'll never get to go to that party, you'll never kiss your husband again, you'll never have a fight or make love again, you'll never make any plans, you'll never have ice-cream or you'll never enjoy a day at the beach again, you'll never cry, you'll never get angry ever again- because you might die tomorrow, or tonight even. And then then it's over. I remember when I used to chat with this guy: how was he to know he only had 4 more years to live? How scary is it? I'm not a religious person, so, I cannot find any comfort whatsoever in faith... and the question is: what's the point? It' so scary and... pointless, I mean, an icy road early and the morning and bang! you're gone forever. Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (25 January 2013): Your insights apply to everything in the universe. Everything dies. A wise person will take that realization and savour their existence and the existence of others to cherish whom and what they have.
Our Earth could be demolished for a hyper-space bypass at any moment so cherish BEING while the getting is good. Remember Carl Sagan when he called our planet a pale blue dot in the vastness of the cosmos.don't sweat the small stuff and be kind and avoid the bullies.
A
female
reader, llifton  +, writes (25 January 2013):
 i understand where you're coming from. i've had that exact same thought, myself. it's terrifying and you never know when your number will be up. but how about this? rather than saying what's the point if i'm just going to die? why not say since i may die tomorrow, i will be sure to make the most of today?
nobody knows when their time will be up. so make sure you live every moment like it could be your last.
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A
male
reader, Frank B Kermit  +, writes (24 January 2013):
 Consider this a wake up call...welcome to the uncertainty of life.
The meaning of your life is what you assign to it. If you decide it means nothing, then it means nothing. If you decide that you have a calling of some kind to fulfill, then your meaning of life is the fulfillment of that calling.
Here are some ideas:
-to contribute to help make the world a better place
-to leave the world better than when you first arrived
-to create something that will last beyond your time on this planet
-to help and or inspire others
-to leave some kind of legacy
-to be an example for the way you beleive is best to live
-find some someone to love and be loved
-to raise a child
-to champion a cause
....and so many others.
It sounds like you are going through some kind of mourning process where you are actually questioning things that you never thought before. This is very normal when someone that you knew dies "before their time", and causes one to question our mortality and what it all means.
My suggestion to clients going through what you are going through is to journal all of your thoughts and write out some lists mentioned above, including what you would want as your epitaph...those exercises will help bring some clarity and focus to you right now.
-Frank
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A
male
reader, no nonsense Aidan  +, writes (24 January 2013):
What’s the point? Well what gives meaning to your life varies hugely from person to person, but it, whatever it is, is the point. This man’s death is a stark reminder of the fragility of human life. All the things you say remind us that we can’t count on having a certain number of years, months, or even days. Even taking accidents out of the equation a person may naturally die suddenly and without warning. That’s why the ideal is to be at peace in life and satisfied with what you have. For example, you may never kiss your husband again, or have the opportunity to tell him how you feel. So make sure you don’t part on an argument. There may not be a tomorrow to say sorry to that person, so do it now. You might not have 10 years to experience that thing you’ve always wanted to experience, so don’t put it off longer than you have to. To be paralysed by the fear of death is harmful, but to have a healthy appreciation of your own mortality and remember that there’s no basis to any assumption that “it won’t be me,” allows you to evaluate whether there are things in your life you want to say, to do, to put right, to change.
I wish you all the very best.
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A
male
reader, fzald +, writes (24 January 2013):
As hurtful and saddening as it is, death is a natural part of life.I'm sure most adults have had the experience of losing someone close to them suddenly.I spoke to my grandmother on the phone one evening, and she died that night. She was in excellent health and there was no reason for me to believe her time was up, but it was.I've lost a couple of friends to cancer.The point of all of this is, life IS valuable and fragile, and the best thing you can do is live life to the fullest as often as you can. I can say that the deaths of people close to me through the years have certainly changed my own outlook on life. I know full well that life can be taken at any point, so I'm going to do what I can to make however much time I have worth something. That's the best anyone can hope for!F
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A
female
reader, k_c100 +, writes (24 January 2013):
 The 'point' is whatever you choose it to be. Religious people have their own idea that we go to heaven if we have been good in life, and that gives their life a reason so to speak.
However in the absence of religion you create your own purpose to life - life can be whatever you want it to be, and most importantly, whatever you MAKE of it.
Life can be nothing, it can be pointless, you can be a hermit staying at home and achieving nothing in life. Or you can go out and enjoy life and make the most of it!
Some people judge their success in life on their success in their career - you can work really hard and become a powerful important person in your chosen area of work if you so wish. Some people want to give back to the community and judge their success in life by how much they help others. So you can go out there, volunteer for charities and do many wonderful things for others. Some people judge their success in life by their family and having children, watching them grow up and become successful people in their own rights - that gives their lives purpose.
For me, I simply want to enjoy every day that I have here on earth. It can be taken away from you at any point, so the best thing you can do is embrace that we are not going to be here forever and make the most of it right NOW. Being miserable and thinking 'what's the point' isnt going to make you happy when you are on your death bed, what will make you happy is the memories of the many wonderful things you have done.
Life is pointlss, the human race doesnt need to expand anymore and we dont need to breed to populate the earth. We are here just because we can be, because our parents chose to have kids and made that decision to give us a chance at life. Once you have embraced the fact that life is pointless and you are never going to find some profound meaning to life, then you can just get on with it and be happy.
Do what makes you happy, be the best person you can be, give something back to others who have less, and go and fulfil your dreams. Make a list of what you want to do in life, where you want to travel, what you want to see, what you want to experience.....that gives your life a purpose in some sense, somthing to aim for - and something to give you many wonderful memories when the time does come for your life to end.
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