A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have this boyfriend that I have been with for 7 months and we love each other so much, but about two weeks ago he came out and told me that he had sex with another girl in September and he swears that after that nothing happened, he had been faithful since then. And yes I'm still with him but am I wrong for that??? I love him so much
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female
reader, EssentiallyMe +, writes (20 February 2008):
 So what was your decision?! What did you do????
A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 February 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionTo all those who gave me that advice I want to thank you all very much because all of ur advice I has help me make my final decision. much love
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A
female
reader, asian tealeaf  +, writes (19 February 2008):
 my dear, why is he telling u now, if it happened in september? if he felt so badly about it he would of told u a while back. my guess is theres some other outside pressure that forced him to spill,uh, the beans. and a cheater is a cheater. people dont cheat unless theres a lack or too much of something negative thereof, within ur relationship. whether its ur fault or not, theres no excuse to cheat, and if one cant remain faithful, or, does not like whats going on within the relationship, should break it off and then do whatever he, or she desires. forgiveness is a beautiful thing sweety, but u just gave him an easy venue to do this again. the problem with women is we use our emotions too much. and if u forgave him, then u should swallow ur ballbearings and ask no questions. u set urself for whatever future results may cum to be. so, are u wrong for staying with him? my opinion is yes. there is no compromise in that. where was the guilt in the moment before he penetrated that other girls vagina? where was the guilt when he orgasmed and called her name, not yours? where was the guilt when he cuddled her close and whispered pillow talk in her ears?
guilt came only after the fact. it did not prevent him from cumming, or prevent him from getting a boner. no, he is as guilty as charged. and u should know better and move on. "Man up" as they say. grow some balls. walk away and find better love. by leaving u will of taught him a valuable lesson. and perhaps he will never do that again. cheating scars people for life. its cruel and mean. and if u guys had had a fight, or he called u a cunt, or whatever, and u forgive him, thats ok. thats compromise. thats love. u are both understanding of eachothers shortcomings. cheating is a quality i dont include in this category. non negotiable. period. i hope i helped u and feel freee to private message me if u desire.
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A
female
reader, O Connor  +, writes (19 February 2008):
 your not wrong for staying with him if you believe him and have faith in your relationship. people do make mistakes, although alot of people think that doesnt happen in relationships. he made a mistake, at least he was honest with you and respects you enought to tell you. if you feel that you are able to forgive him, then stay with him. the only thing that would make me advise you to leave him would be if you didnt trust him, thought he was going to do it again etc. since you are still in early stages of a relationship, im sure that it was a complete mistake and it wont happen again, and i think your right to give him a second chance, we all deserve them in the end.xx
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A
female
reader, EssentiallyMe +, writes (19 February 2008):
I'm not sure, part of me is screaming HELL NO BREAK UP WITH THE BASTARD yet the other part is like WELL EVERYONE DESERVES A SECOND CHANCE. I think it's good that he finally told you about it, that means he feels remorse, but because of how bad he feels he may not be telling the whole truth. I say give him a second chance, THATS IT. But be highly skeptical in the mean time. You have every right to be suspicious now and keep tabs on him.
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A
female
reader, hlskitten  +, writes (19 February 2008):
 Hi
Depends if you can forgive him?
You wont forget it, but if you can move on from it and not keep bringing it up all the time, and you love each other and believe he wont do it again, then you're right to stay with him.
If not then, it wont work.
Good luck.
C xxxxx
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