A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:At work I've met these two guys and I don't know who to choose between - they both have asked me out. They have even started to dislike each other because they both want to go out with me and they both tried to play off of each other to win me over, it's sometimes really embarrasing for me and them because everyone at work talks about us and the fact that there is some sort of love triangle going on. One of them is always telling me bad things about the other one and this has made me start to think that he would do anything for me but i really don't know how i can choose between them both. I can't talk to anyone at work about it because they'll just laugh at me and my friends don't care as ive bored them with it so much. Should i choose one or forget them both, or stay frineds with both only or maybe go out with both to see who i like most?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 May 2007): I have the same problem!!! These two boys at school are always getting into fist fights and getting in trouble because of figting over me. I just ignore them both. Boys that fight over a girl are immature and have no respect for the girl they are fighting over. They probably just mean for you to be a booty call anyway. Ignore them!!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 May 2007): The main issue I see here is that you are at WORK. THEY work at the same place as you.
Do you begin to see a problem? No, well then, let me tell you something: with them fighting over you and the office gossip, there is a danger that you'll all get so caught up in it, that your respective jobs will suffer, and then, guess what? You might very well be reprimanded for letting your personal life interfere with your job, and one or both of them could get fired!
A word to the wise: Act like professionals, not as someone else wrote, third-graders.
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A
female
reader, Just a Girl... +, writes (8 May 2007):
 huni your not married to either of them so hav no commitment to either one. Who are they to dictate to you which one is better for you and who you shud be with??if you like them then date them both! dating doesnt mean being monogomous it means having a great time n a laugh with different people to see what you want.
take care huni! xxx
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (8 May 2007): the guy who bad mouths the other wud concern me - sounds a creep.dusnt mean he wud do anythin for u - or if he wud its not in a healthy way.do u like either of them? prob wot shud decide which 1 or neither - not wot they think
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A
male
reader, sleepyhollow  +, writes (8 May 2007):
I concur with those who think that you should ignore them both.
This is a workplace, and while many romances start off in the office, it doesn't sound like either guy is particularly intriguing for you.
Be firm, and tell both of them to get their heads out of the clouds. If they refuse to lay off the pressure, tell them that their competition is making you feel uncomfortable. If necessary, drop in the word, "harassed". That should send them scurrying back to the grade school they apparently escaped from.
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A
female
reader, Carina  +, writes (8 May 2007):
 There is no reason why you should have to commit to one guy over another if you have only just met them both. However, if you decide to see them both for a while before making a decision then you'll probably have to suffer them slagging each other off. There's also a danger that their interest is fired partly by the fact that they're in competition. (Are you sure you're not secretly enjoying all this attention?) Personally I would explain to them that you're not ready to go out with just one guy at this stage, but you like them both as friends and could you see them both and leave it at that for the timebeing. Hopefully they'll be mature enough to cope with that situation.
If not then I would leave them both alone and look elsewhere for a relationship. Relationships at work frequently lead to trouble, so that may be your best solution. I hope that helps a bit!
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A
female
reader, AndersAmanda  +, writes (8 May 2007):
 I say forget them both, If they are not mature enough to not fight over you like third graders then they don't deserve you.
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