A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Ive been with my bf for a while now and we are just in the process of buying a house. I have a few trust issues in general with everyone. He has a bit of a past which everyone does but i went through his mobile knowing that he in the past has done it to me. I found a picture of his ex-girlfriend...topless. Im really upset about this and want to confront him but dont know how. I dont understand why he still has it on his phone. PLease help!!
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female
reader, splendid_spiders  +, writes (25 July 2007):
OMG! I'm sorry, but dump him! Men like that really don't care if they lose their partner or not ... they have no respect for their sagnificant other! If you want to talk to him about it, go ahead ... but in my opinion, he doesn't deserve it at all. I may be jumping the gun, but I'm 31 and I've spent too much of my life forgiving men for the disrespect they gave me. Now, I finally have a man who treats me like a princess and it has really helped me to open my eyes to the respect a woman deserves. There are good men out there ... men who look ahead and not behind at their exs. And there are men out there who will respect you and really love you. There is someone out there who will look at you as the princess you are. And that will be the person worth talking to. That will be the person worthy of your time. I suggest you move on with your life.
A
female
reader, Beckto +, writes (25 July 2007):
 You have to figure out how to talk to him about this before you buy the house. That is a very big commitment, and for him to have something like that on his phone, it wouldn't sit well with me. Just take a big breath and sit him down to talk. The hardest part is starting the conversation. Say something like, "I know I shouldn't have gone through your mobile, but I did. I understand if you're mad at me, but I really feel we need to talk about the picture of your ex I saw. What is that about?" See what he says.
Good luck.
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A
male
reader, DJ8433 +, writes (25 July 2007):
 It sounds like he hasn't moved on yet. Ask him when he put the picture on his phone, and when he intends on deleting it. He may have been keeping it for "posterity", but now you've found it. If he doesn't delete it right there in front of you, then guess what ... you must not be the girl for him. I suggest moving on, because obviously he does not "love you enough" to delete a photo. Keep in mind if he does delete the photo in front of you and you still stay with him that anything that was hiding before will now go deeper underground. So, you could let this one slide and keep your mouth shut to see what other goodies he provides you. I wouldn't have the tolerance for it myself, but you need to decide that. Decide what you want to do and do it.
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