A
female
,
*lqueen
writes: I am in a similar situation as one of the other readers. I too told my boyfriend I loved him with him not saying that in return. I am so scared now that I will have scared him away. That night he was extra sweet and I have to say that I kinda shunned him but just cause I was so upset at the time. I am getting over it and plan on trying to act completely normal. But, now he hasn't called in over a day. We have been together for almost a year. Do you think there is any hope? I really care for him deeply.
View related questions:
hasn't called Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, StarNews +, writes (29 December 2005):
You're welcome Queen! Please let us know the outcome. I hope he calls you soon. I wish you the best.
A
female
reader, llqueen +, writes (29 December 2005):
Just want to thank you all for your responses. I really appreciate it. I am starting to feel better. I just want to talk to him to make sure everything is okay. Don't know whether to call him or give him time like StarNews said. Maybe I will tell him I am sorry for making him feel uncomfortable? I don't know. Never had this problem before.
...............................
A
female
reader, Tinkz +, writes (29 December 2005):
llqueen
After a year I would have assumed he would have said it first, but men are weird!
There may be a reason for him not calling, have you tried to call him?
You did say that he was being extra sweet that night, so maybe when you shunned him, it hurt his feelings, have you thought about it like that?
Go to him, tell him that you do love him but you are not forcing him to say it, that way he will know how you feel and in time when he is ready, he won't be afraid of saying it to you! Men need time in that department, it's normal for them, just hang in there!
Call him!
...............................
A
female
reader, StarNews +, writes (29 December 2005):
Give him time, he may not be certain of how he feels or just needs to absorb what you said. Those are powerful words, but you were telling him what is in your heart. Its not so bad that he didnt respond and he may not have called because he needs time to think. You told him how you felt, which probably makes you feel vulnerable, but the ball is in his court now. Its best not to contact him, though Im sure you are tempted to. You may be putting more thought into it than you need to. Its only been a day since he called, and I am sure he will call you.
...............................
A
female
reader, Kitten4000 +, writes (29 December 2005):
I definately think there is hope! Sure, you had an awkward moment, a REALLY awkward moment, but its not fatal. So now he knows how much you care, at the very least he should treasure that. It may have been hard that he wasn't able to return the statement, but this may be a good time to evaluate your relationship. Are both of you really happy, does he need more time, or is he not as invested in the relationship as you? Maybe he just needs more time, and meanwhile maybe you could just talk to him and explain how you feel and that you don't want to rush or pressure him into saying something he is not ready for.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 December 2005): hello,
i am sure that since you have been together for over a year, you have had a lot of time together and you saying that you love him has not scared him off. perhaps that he has never thought about loving someone and that it means usually being in a committed relationship.
if you truely love him, i think that you are brave for saying to to him and i commend you for it. that takes a lot of courage. maybe his silence means that he just needs time to think about things. maybe he hasn't called because he has been busy. if i were you i woud continue acting normal and wait until he brings up the topic of love.
i think that without question, there is deffinitely hope for the two of you. just because he never said "i love you" back doesn't necessarily mean that he doesn't love you!!! wait it out and follow your heart! best of luck!
...............................
A
male
reader, AgonyUncle +, writes (29 December 2005):
hi llqueen,
it seems to me that he is highly embarrised and doesnt know how to respond, i think you need to just help him a long a little , he may find it hard speaking his feelings, ask him to write or type up a letter with all his feelings towards you written down this way it is less nerve wracking for him! or maybe there is a problem with you? do you often tell him you love him maybe you say it so ofen he just takes it in his stride, i seriously doubt he would stick with you for 1 year if he didnt love you in return!
Keep working at it love!
Best Of Luck !! Tom
...............................
|