A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:I know this isn't the best question for this site, but i know there are many smart people on this site who can help me. Any tips for high school? I'm an incoming freshman and I am nervous! Anything you can give me, tips for making friends, for dealing with school related stress, with organization, anything would be helpful. Even some stories fom when you were in high school.Thanks! Reply to this Question
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reader, maverick494 +, writes (31 August 2011):
You're welcome! I've got a few more things I'd like to add.
#1. I was a total slacker in high school, thinking I'd deal with the future...in the future. Because of this my grades weren't so great and I spent quite a few years making up for that mistake and wasting money on extra education I wouldn't have needed if I had paid attention the first time around. So keep that in mind. Don't make a clear cut plan, but it would be nice if you have an idea about what you want to become and how to get there. You'll grow up faster than you might think!
#2. I've been bullied in elementary school and high school. In order to prevent it from happening this time is to mark your boundaries and never let people cross them. I was a total doormat in high school because I wanted to fit in so badly and ended up being bullied and shunned instead. They even made a fake Myspace page (when that was as popular as fb is now) in my name. So once you sense people testing your boundaries, calmly let them know you won't be toyed with. People are always looking for a scapegoat to blame things on, so make sure you won't set off their radar.
#3. Another culprit is gossip. Be very wary when it comes to participating. I've always been Switzerland when it comes to that and it served me well. In uni we had this irritating guy who was too cocky for his own good and at one point a group of us were talking about him behind his back and I said: "I'm by no means his biggest fan, but it's not fair to talk when he's not there to defend himself." The discussion ended right there without forcing me to choose sides.
#4. Lastly, don't worry too much. You'll do fine. Hope you have a good year!
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 August 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks! :) you were all really helpful! Oh and 19reginna84 i was bullied in elementary school too so I feel your pain! I switched schools a few years after so theres no chance of me being tormented by those particular people again. Thanks again!
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A
female
reader, baby-blue-eyes  +, writes (30 August 2011):
1) be confident :) it works wonders i was never confident until year 11 which is the final year over here and once i was i made so many new friends and i also got so many new oppurtunitys 2) be nice to teachers and get them on your side but dont be a suck up. i had to talk to my teachers a lot and they had to watch me more closely because of medical reasons so i became a lot of their favourites and i got away with murder with them because of it :) 3) be yourself and never try to fit into what somebody else wants you to be because it'll only make you unhappy4) revise i know this sounds like a no brainer but its so important5) take every oppurtunity even if its something like carrying books for a peer or a teacher. teachers will respect you if you help out and your peers will like you more6)develop a healthy self esteem i know this is difficult but its so important especially for a girl i only got a good self esteem recently and the amount of guys attention ive had since then has increased loads even twenty something year olds flirt with me. guys love a confident girl7) choose your friends carefully they reflect on you too dont be friends with people who distract you or lead you astray or make you into somebody youre not. i would do anything for my best friends and thats why i make sure they wouldnt ask me to do anything bad8) when you first fall 'in love' dont over scrutinise it. it probably wont last forever so make the most of the time you spend together and create some good memories that'll last forever9) dont waste your time over boys who dont want you or play you and dont treat you right i guarentee theyll be another one that likes you and will treat you like a princess :)10) make sure you finish your homework/coursework on time11) smile a lot it makes you seem a lot more approachable12) dont be a push over stand up for what you believe in but dont be arrogant and refuse to listen to other peoples opinions. accept people will have different opinions youlastly just have fun my last year of high school when i did all this was the bestyear of my life and ive made life long friends through it . good luck :)
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 August 2011): When it comes to friends, I say you just need to be yourself and be confidant in who you are. I know this is hard when you're a freshman. But it is better to be friends with people who are similar to you than to try to change yourself for others. Plus, confidance is huge when it comes to to friendships, life success, and other relationships as well. Friendships will form naturally.Also don't be judgemental or a bully, and if you're being bullied beware of that. A lot of people brush it off saying "everyone is bullied, it's not a big deal." But I was badly bullied as a kid and it is a big deal. And I was fortunate in the fact that I grew up before the internet. I feel for all of you who have to deal with cyber bullies. There is no escape these days. So I advise you to block any contact points with all bullies, and if you are being bullied beyond what you can handle please don't go it alone. Seek help. :) My other advice is don't try to be popular or find true love. Those things really are not that important. Focus on your school and the future. As you get older you'll meet a lot of people and the popular people fade away just like everyone else. Love comes when it comes and you can't force it. But you have control over how well you do in life, so worry more about that. Don't let people drama get in they way.Freshman year is a tough one! I wish you luck and a happy high school career!
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A
female
reader, maverick494 +, writes (30 August 2011):
I'm happy you ask this question because that means you've thought it through more than I did at your age. I will list some of the things I wish I knew 10 years ago (when I was 13) and hope they will be helpful to you.
1. Always be relaxed in your own skin. This is going to be hard because everyone gets scrutinized when they go to high school. Everyone feels insecure. Some of them will cover it up with a mask of confidence, others are more transparent. Try to find a balance. Dress how you like, do your hair how you like and avoid using big amounts of makeup because they will make your skin break out. Don't be intimidated by those who make comments about your appearance. When they do, just shrug and tell them you feel comfortable the way you are and that you don't feel the need to harp on their appearance either. Live and let live.
2. Stay true to yourself. If you have an opinion, keep it no matter what the popular kid thinks or says. People like it when you're not a push over. At the same time, be open to arguments to the contrary. Being opinionated doesn't mean being pigheaded.
3. Write down the days you plan to work on an assignment, not just the deadlines. This way you'll be reminded of tasks you need to complete before it's too late. If you have trouble concentrating at home, stay at school longer to finish your homework so you'll have the rest of the evening to yourself.
4. Ask for help in time. When an assignment is too difficult, don't wait till the last minute or when it's already to late to ask for help. I made this mistake many times, thinking I'd get it somehow and then finally having to realize I couldn't.
5. When your teacher says you should read a chapter of a book, actually do it. It's much easier to get through tests having gone through the material step by step than suddenly cramming it in your brain one day beforehand.
6. Pay attention to what your teacher is telling you. This may sound like a no-brainer, but I have been able to get through tests much easier by simply paying attention in class instead of fooling around all the time. Sure, there's a place for jokes and other stuff, just make sure it doesn't make up the bulk of class.
7. Don't be too eager when making friends. People can sense that from a mile away and it will have the opposite effect of what you're going for. Simply chat a bit and wait around. Don't invite people over too soon. Get to know them first.
8. When you find someone you click with really well, don't cling to them. Mingle with others, be sociable.
9. If you haven't already, get involved in sports. Meet people outside the classroom so you won't be dependent on friends from your neighbourhood or school.
10. Never do anything you're not comfortable with in order to fit in. Again a no brainer, but you'd be surprised how many people do this every year.
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