A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Ok so this is just one about cheating and being unfaithful I would like to ask the females since I'm a guy. If you cheated on someone in the first two weeks of a relationship because it was long distance and you didn't think that person would last long anyways, would you come clean and tell them the truth after they stayed with you for 2 or more years, or would you just keep it hidden and try to forget it even happened not to hurt the person you now love?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 February 2011): If you can live with it, don't say anything about it. My wife told me about an affair that happen our first year. I forgave and then many years later I didn't like one of her male friends and it turned into her saying I didnt trust her. Not what I I was thinking about, but she took it the wrong way and caused drama. I had an almost perfect marriage until the second time the issue came up. Now we're in limbo of surviving. Point is I Love her and wish she would have never told me or told me when it happen so we could address the real issues present. Now I may lose everything over some BS i forgave and forgot about!
A
male
reader, Capri2  +, writes (31 January 2011):
I think the problem here is whether this will eat _you_ up. I mean, if you are writing this this has to be something that bothers you enough. In the other hand, unless she decide to tell you, you will never know for sure based in whatever she may answer.I would recommend you to just leave it, if you can.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (31 January 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionAll good answers and what was what I was looking for, but the truth is I never cheated on her at all, actually the opposite situation. I caught wind of her cheating on me when she went on a vacation right after we started dating. (She went to Myrtle Beach with friends two weeks after we had began dating) I was a "popular guy in high school" and I play college football, she wasn't popular at our school (I actually like that she wasn't) so I wanted to know if what I heard about her might have been true, she didn't believe we would last being the "type" I am and how guys have treated her.So all in all I think she might have and I wanted to know if she would hide it forever or just come clean with it. From pretty much all the answers, it sounds like I'll never know, which sucks, but if it doesn't eat her up, guess I wouldn't want to know for sure anyway.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 January 2011): what do u mean.. you were tgogather 2 years, then went long dsitance, then 2 weeks into the ldr you cheated? or you cheated at the very begining of the 2 years 2 weeks into the relationship? either way i wouldnt say shi* dude. Just leave it and forget about it, you obviously love eachother and there is no point breaking that trust, just dont do it again! I dont believe in that rule, once a cheater always a cheater, thats bullshi*. People make mistakes, thats what life is about, learning from your mistakes, and you can always be forgivin but you must forgive yourself and stay true to yourself if you dont want it on your conciounse my freind! Its all about what comes from within... you must understand this. goodluck.
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A
male
reader, Capri2 +, writes (28 January 2011):
Bringing it up now won't do any good. Even when I think that cheating the first day is like cheating the 365th day. If it's a serious relationship.
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A
female
reader, Eskim0  +, writes (28 January 2011):
It was two years ago, it only happened once and at the very earliest stage of your relationship...I'd say you'd be best off to let it go.
There's no use hurting her when it occurred so long ago.
You may just have to live with your guilt.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 January 2011): No do not bring it up! it was the first 2 weeks AND she will properly forgive you for it as it happened that early but the pain may tear you two apart. You have to live with your guilt and that is your punishment. Dont punish her too
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A
female
reader, Nime +, writes (28 January 2011):
 I totally agree with Cerberus. I wouldn't want my boyfriend to tell me either.
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A
male
reader, Cerberus_Raphael  +, writes (28 January 2011):
 Considering the circumstances, I would not bring it up now. It would be rather pointless, firstly because you did it in the first two weeks of your relationship when you were presumably not that close and when this was a long distance thing and whilst this does not justify your actions in any way, it just shows how pointless a confession would be now. Secondly because it would only serve to ruin this relationship. If you feel guilty, you can just make sure that it never happens again and that you are the best you can be to her.
You have learnt your lesson now, never assume the future.
I hope that helps.
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A
female
reader, AuntTLC  +, writes (28 January 2011):
It depends. BE COMPLETELY HONEST - but there is no reason to bring up something so insignificant. If she goes asking about it - come clean, but otherwise, there's really nothing to be guilty about.
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