A
female
age
36-40,
*stina
writes: I have hpv 2 and i'm starting to see this guy. Should I tell him? I really like him, and i want him to leave his girlfriend for me. But I have this issue, and I think if I tell him he wont leave her for me. But we have been hanging out and talking a lot, and we even kissed last saturday. What should I do? Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (3 December 2010):
I agree FULLY with CaringGuy.. What a mess.
And YES, go see your doctor, this can potentially cause cervical cancer later on in life in not treated and YES you have to tell potential bedfellows/sex partners about any and all STD's.
A
female
reader, DrPsych +, writes (3 December 2010):
You should always tell potential partners that you are a HPV carrier, and then explain what it is as many people won't know. You should also think that if he is cheating with you, then he may have had multiple sexual partners. It is not just a question of whether you will pass something to him...what is he going to give to you? I think if he has an unprotected sexual relationship with you and then goes back to his girlfriend he could put her at risk. Cheating on her is one matter, but putting her health at risk is quite another. The fact is that if this guy is willing to cheat with you, he probably won't care if he passes this on to his girlfriend as it is all part of the same irresponsible mindset. That means you have to take responsibility for the whole situation. Refuse to sleep with him until he leaves her. If you want him as your boyfriend then you must be aware that if he cheats on his girlfriend, he will cheat on you too. He may seem wonderful right now but he obviously doesn't have too much thought for this other girl. Be careful and be safe!
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A
male
reader, Jmtmj +, writes (3 December 2010):
You tell him... no "if's", "but's" or "maybe's".
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (3 December 2010):
This is a disaster before you've even got started.
First of all, why on earth are you seeing a guy who has a girlfriend? Why? If he treats his girlfriend badly, why will he change and treat you well? He won't. This guy's cheating with you, and you and him are making a mockery of this other girl. Of course he won't leave her for you. They never do. He'll just use you, then move on. Why pick a cheat? He'll only do it to you.
Secondly, and more seriously, when you have anything such as HPV2 or whatever, you HAVE to tell anyone you're serious with. It would be exceptionally cruel not to tell someone that you have it, only for them to catch it. There are people out there who understand HPV, and who will be able to deal with it.
But, imagine that you and this guy have sex. Imagine he catches it. Imagine that he goes to his girlfriend and has sex with her and she gets it. By not saying anything, and by being involved with a cheat, you will have caused pain and suffering to a totally innocent person.
HPV is a very good reason to look at your life and re-address your goals in life. It isn't the end of the world, as I hope you're aware. But it means that you need to take responsibility for yourself and other people.
So, stop with this guy. He's a cheat, and you could wind up hurting a lot of people (and even being taken to court and sued). Then, spend time going out and meeting a good, decent guy who will care for you and understand everything about you.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 December 2010): ~UNCONDITIONAL LOVE~
Tell him the truth, because it could potentially affect him biologically if he and you are intimate...EQUALLY IMPORTANT...if he truly loves you, he will accept all of you and will walk hand in hand with you in this...That's what true love is about....AND...if he bails out on you because of it, then Thank God for sparing you of a self-absorbed, heartless asshole! You are waaaaaaaay too valuable to allow person's of such character in your world, as they will only pull you down into their pit hole. Life is to Precious to entertain other person's insecurities and drama. Always remember this no matter what life may bring to you, good, bad, indifferent or otherwise.
God Bless.
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A
male
reader, advisorX +, writes (3 December 2010):
You should start to see a Dr first so that your problem will be properly treated. There are lots of guys out there, why trying to snatch someone else's boyfriend?
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