A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi, i dont know if im being oversensitive here but i just want some feedback. Im 27 and been doing driving lessons just over a year now.My instructor wants me to book my test in and im just not confident. Last night on my driving lesson he told me "sort your life out,you arent a baby anymore".I was quite shocked at this -ok so im a bit old not to be already driving but i have a good job and recently got myself a diploma.A bit of background about me:I live at home with my parents purely because my boyfriend works away alot-he is home every 3 month for a couple of weeks and if we got a house together i'd be living on my own which i dont want-i dont know if he was insinuating that at my age i should be further forward in life than i am.What are your thoughts?Thanksx Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Miss Karma Louise +, writes (7 November 2009):
he didnt really have the right to say this but it has obviosuly affected you and gave you something to have a think about.
he didnt say enything about your personal life,you decided that alone.
taking a test when your not ready is sometimes the best thing you can do,as it gives high motivavtion.
book it for a month and get stuck in to it.
even if you fail youll now what to expect next time and have more confidence.
if your in lessons for long period of time you get a little dishartened..and just think about quitting.
he proberly just said it ti get you to do it..
Prove him wrong..and try to pass.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 November 2009): LessonsLearned makes a good point about moving out of home,think about it. However i do not agree with his comments about taking 1 year to do learn to drive being excessive!I took 2 years, 3 driving instructors and 4 tests before i passed. Each at their own pace. A colleague of mine did hers in 9 months-passed 1st time and has been involved in numerous accidents and written of 2 cars. My cousin passed on her 8th attempt and is an excellent driver..better than me.Book your self in as marieclaire said-atleast u know what too expect and you can always re do it!Good luckx
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A
male
reader, LessonsLearned  +, writes (7 November 2009):
He made an insensitive comment and was a bit of a clod. But maybe it's bothering you because you may feel on some level theres an element of truth in what he's saying. It's not the comment that really hurts, it's what we perceive as the truth in comments that people make that really hurts and can stay with us.
Who cares if he was insinuating you should be further along in life. His opinion is his own. Thats not really important. Do YOU feel that you should be further along in life? Thats the real issue. So when you ask that question your really asking 1. If its true, and 2. If other people here will agree with him.
A year of training to learn to drive seems a bit excessive to say the least. I think it's possible you may have an undiagnosed anxiety disorder. If so, medications like Xanax can work wonders in reducing your apprehensions.
As for living at home, it's rarely a good idea to stay in the nest too long. I understand your apprehensions about living alone, perhaps taking on a friend as a roommate (flat mate?) would ease your transition out of the house.
Talk to your doctor about anxiety disorders, get diagnosed, move out of the house and schedule your driving test. In that order, thats my advice. Don't worry if you are or aren't behind schedule in life. Dont worry about anything in fact. Just learn to challenge yourself daily to achieve today what you couldn't yesterday. Good luck! :)
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A
female
reader, Full moon temptress1 +, writes (7 November 2009):
i would change your instructor.I had the same experience myself,except mine shouted at me on the lesson just before my test.I failed it of course.I found another instructor stright after that.Don't feel bad about taking lessons at your age at least your doing it.Good luck.x
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