| A
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: can anybody help a looser??i feel like a complete nobody at the minute. i am so depressed and yes i know its my fault but i dont know what to do about it. i am a 15, female and live in the uk. have a mum, no dad, no grandparents and no other family. im an only child and me and my mum live on our own. because i have no family and have been excluded from school perminatly so dont see my frends i have no one to talk to. me and my boyfriend have recently split up after 19 month, then exactly a week after we split i was raped by a 31 year old man on my way home from a friends house. i have always had bad things happen to me like loosing my dad at 11 and my nana and grandad at 13 all to cancer. i have had to be strong for my mum so i cant tell her anything thats going on because i know she wouldnt cope. i just dont know wat to do with myself. i went through a stage when i lost my nana and grandad of smoking, taking drugs and drinking anything i could get my hands on. ive thought of running away and starting a new life but i cant leave my mum behind alone she need me and i do need her. i knwo this probably isnt even a question. maybe im just wining. i dont know but i need to sort my head out. can anyone help?? plasee im so desperate please help me! thanx for reading x
View related questions:
depressed, drugs, split up Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 September 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthankyou everyone for your answers
my mum had a brother but he died in a car accident a few years ago with his 2 daughters while they where on theire way on holiday, this is why i have no other family. yea i do have friends i just dont see them because i dont go to school and i am normally with my mum. thanx for the advice anyway i reall appreiciate it =]
A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 September 2007): Have you reported being raped? If not you should.
I agree with many of the other comments, you certainly have had a tough life up till now but you can turn it around, why don't you enroll at college in something that you enjoy, college is much more relaxed than school and it will give you something to focus on.
You and your mom both need each other but it seems you are holding dark demands inside and they need to be let out or they will destroy you. Please talk to your mom. If there is only the two of you then you should be especially united and together. Im sure if you explain how you feel your mom may beable to do something about it.
It sounds to me like you are in an emotional rut, have you been to your doctor about the way you feel. I dont like people to be on anti depressants unless they are desparate but it sounds as if you are pretty low, if he suggests these then ask if you can try speaking to a counciler first - its less addictive and to offload your feelings, worries and emotions onto someone that is an outsider makes things a hell of alot easier.
You say you have no friends, why is this? Not one? Also you have no aunties, uncles etc? Your mom was an only child?
Please speak to someone, and I need to tell you that you are not a loser, no matter how low you are or how tough times get. You are an equal to everyone around you.
...............................
A
male
reader, rcn  +, writes (22 September 2007):
 The female who answered first, I think she's a bit faster than me in answering questions. Beats me every time.
First, my heart really does go out to you and you mum. You've both been through a lot, and reading your story, I'm a bit worried. You say you need to be strong for her. You can't be strong for someone else until you've gained your strength.
What I am truly worried about is your feelings. By holding everything in, your suppressing your hurt.
You are so young, and you're trying to take on a bit much. You're trying to be strong for two, instead of sharing the strength between the both of you.
My advise would be to tell her. You both have a great cry together, yell scream, kick (not each other), and both of you get your feeling out. Then you'll be stronger so you can both figure out where to go from there. I'm sure your mum has some to release too. Take care of each other and start by helping each other through this difficult time.
Take care, and good luck with everything.
...............................
A
female
reader, leanne.od  +, writes (22 September 2007):
 none of this is your fault!
i'm so sorry you have had a hard time time throughout your teenage years but you have coped well in my opinion. nobody would handle their dad, gran and grandad dying much differently to you. most children experiment in drugs and alcohol, you just did it a bit early but with great reason.
as for the rape, this is a terrible ordeal and you need to coe to terms with it to enable you to move on. a councillor is the best option i can think of because you need to express your feelings and emotions and until you do, it's going to eat away at you.
i commend you for putting your mum's feelings first but you are her little girl, her world and she needs to know how you feel, she's alot tougher than you think. it'd break her heart more, knowing yuo felt like you can't talk to her when you teo are so close. she can help you through it and you need her support.
i wish you the best of luck and remember, you are not a nobody, you are very brave young lady who has experienced things most of us never go through in our lifetime all at a young age. i hope you realise your self worth and rebuild your confidence.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 September 2007): First off you are not a nobody you are a very strong young woman to go through all you have at your age and even more sencible to ask for help, you are also very compasionate to consider your mums feeling in all of this which shows that you care for others. You really need to speak with your mum or your doctor about how you feel and also tell them what has happened to you so you can get help asap, as I feel you are too young to cope with all of this on your own.You have come through the stages of drugs/drink which is not easy you can cope with this and see light at the end, remeber your not on your own and I am sure you will get lots of advice from the great aunts/uncles on this site. I hope you get help and start to feel stronger soon I have every faith you are strong enoughTake care
...............................
A
female
reader, superbunny +, writes (21 September 2007):
 Honey,Without sounding like a patronising old bat, have you thought about counselling at all? You've been through a fair lot and you're so young! Perhaps it would be good to talk it through with someone - maybe your mum?Running away won't solve anything, sweetheart - it'll just open a door to a whole load of new problems. Things that you don't need on top of everything else in your life.I'm sorry to hear about your dad and your grandparents - did you ever talk to anyone about them passing away; you may find it helps.I wouldn't worry about boyfriends are the moment - they're often more trouble than they're worth! Concentrate on seeing your friends; perhaps have them over to your house? Try to distance yourself from friends who'll involve you with drugs or alcohol or smoking, it may seem fun now but it's just gonna screw you up further down the line.If you want to talk, feel free to private message me.Hope I've helped a little bit. :] x
...............................
|
