A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:i am 16 years old with a boyfriend of 18 and we are very much in love. i have clinical depression (external) and my boyfriend is a great support for me , i was bullied all the way through highschool and they made my life even more of a misery than it already was for me, when i had the oppertunity to move to a college far away i did. i made lots of new friends who were very understanding about the obvious depression and have made allowences for that,but recently one of the people who mentally abused me has transfered to the same college as me and has started causing problems conserning me, my friends and my boyfriend although they say they dont beleive her the paranoid in my head plays havok with me the newest one i have heard is i about my boyfriend, this has hurt me the most as this girl has no right to comment on me nevermind my bf. i am a strong person (if it wasnt for the depression)and i have tried sorting but it just gets worse each time i can feal my self getting more and more down everyday and getting more and more angry, with each and every childish comment i feal like one day extreamily soon i will snap either resulting in me hospitilising this girl or resorting back to self harm , and i dont want either. please help.
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female
reader, this_years_love  +, writes (9 October 2007):
 everyone else's advice seems excellent so far
the only other thing i would suggest is to talk to a counsillor at school. This girl likely has problems herself and is trying to seam cool or powerful to her friends. explain the situation and ask that it be monitered. if it continues, you can attend a meeting mediated by a teacher whome you trust. this means that the teacher will not take sides, but allow both of you to have a turn to speak. it may seam completely un-doable at first but think about it-confronting this girl in a healthy way in a situation where neither of you can become out of controle could really work. asking her straight up what her problem is will likely dumbfound her and embarass her greatly. i would be surprised if she didn't stop after a meeting like this. just be sure to remain poised and be mature about it-don't name call, explain how you feel and clearly state that you are wondering why she singles you out. she will be given the chance to answer and will have to hear you out.
xx
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 October 2007): My boyfriend (he's 17, I'm 15) also suffers from clinical depression and deals with aggravating people in his day-to-day life (his parents). I have found that finding one specific area of interest in which he can truly immerse himself and 'get away from it all' has really helped him, and our relationship. The less you show the person that their words have an effect, they will get less out of tormenting you and eventually stop. It sounds like you have supportive friends, who will stick by you. Maybe get out and do things with them more, this person can't follow you everywhere!
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A
female
reader, dont_worry  +, writes (9 October 2007):
 You should stop letting her control you.
you need to be stronger and let her know you are not the same girl of high school, you have changed and now you will not let her dominate you, she has no right to intrude in your life.
she needs to start respecting you, please ask for your friend's help to reject her.
about the depression thing... dont you think you are taking it too serious? i mean i dont understand you, now you have friends, you are in love wih a wonderful person, why are you still depressed? i mean you should be happy =) in this life theres no need to be depressed you should enjoy it and live it to the fullest, please my advice: take courage, personality, character, be strong, dont let others rule you. You are much better then that stupid girl, dont let her scared you again, let her know who has the charge now
you are worth it, take care and good luck =)
dont ever think again about hurting yourself okay?
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A
male
reader, rcn +, writes (8 October 2007):
 Self harm, NO. Why would you allow this girl to have that power over you? If you create self harm, you're giving your power over to this other person. You need to be strong, and your friends as well. If she comes over to your friends talking her stuff about you. You're friends should tell her "Sorry, she's our friend, and we don't want you coming over here talking crap because whenever you open your mouth, that what sees to be pouring out of it."
You also need to seek some counseling. When depression gets this deep, it's time to take action, and not let it increase.
If this continues, I'd have a conversation with the school, and let them know what's going on. I'm not saying she can't go to school there, but they can arrange where your classes are not together and that during your time in school she is not to have any contact with you or those you associate with.
This is so true "The stupid will remain stupid." Don't take to her behavior. People who act like she does have much worse mental problems than depression.
If that doesn't work, have her served by the court for harassment, and ordered to stop all contact with you, and if she violates that, they'd arrest her.
That's really all I have to offer, other than putting her in her place, but then you might get into trouble. Don't get yourself into trouble because of the stupidity of someone else.
I really wish you luck with this. I hope everything works out and get some additional help with the depression.
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