| A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: So I recently broke up with my boyfriend, and I'm going through a really rough time at home as well. Lately I've just felt really down and depressed, like theres no point in my life and that it's just like a routine I have to do everyday. I still really love my boyfriend, but I think he's moved on from us and is with someone else. I'm telling you this because recently I have started to have feelings towards my best friend, and I'm not a lesbian or bisexual! I feel like she's the only person who understands me and I can't tell her how I feel! Do I just feel like this because I need support right now? I think if anything did happen I wouldn't try to force it on by telling her how I feel, I'd just let it happen. Please help me!
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female
reader, smeedle  +, writes (10 January 2007):
 At times fo stress and change we oftern turn to our friends for comfort and guidence, and friendship of this sort because we are already emotionally un-stable can become confused, she is supporting, kind and loving with you, all the qualities of a really good friend and you need this but you are also lonely and in need of comfort and hugs and this is maybe where the boundaries are becomming blurred for you and you are reading more into the relationship because you want more, you want to be held and kissed and made to feel loved, secure and safe once more and in her you see what you want as a possible reality.
When my friends are upset I put my arms around them male or female and hold them close while they cry or just to let them know that I love and care for them, I may kiss the top of there head and hold them for some time, I do this because I feel there pain and with holding them want to take some of it away and kiss it better, it does not mean that I fancy them.
But after saying all that, there maybe an attraction between you that is very real but I will say to you what i would to anyone, be carefull as any relation now would be a rebound one.
A
female
reader, dragonette  +, writes (10 January 2007):
 I'm sorry things ended between you and your boyfriend. You have my sympathies.
About your feelings for your friend: Sometimes, when people have a very good friend, they confuse the love of friendship with something else (happened to me too, so you're not alone).It think it is, as you said, that you really appreciate her for her support and understanding.
Maybe your need for someone to be there for you is creating these feelings also.
Or maybe it's just the fact that you're young and still a bit unsure of your sexuality.
Whatever you do decide to do, please remember that if you tell her about how you feel things will never be the same between the two of you, and it would be a shame to risk such a good friend.
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A
female
reader, kath +, writes (10 January 2007):
 The fealings you have/had for your ex will pass all in good time, time is a great healer!! but your friend on the other hand will be there for life, your right in thinking the fealings you have for her are true but you are allowed to love your girlfriends without any kind of sexual contact. you say your life has the same routine everyday only you can make a change to this take a step back and look how you can change this, it does'nt have to be a major change sometimes the small ones are the ones that count, maybe a walk go swimming somthing you may have thort of before and did'nt do, good luck x
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