A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'm a 22 year old female, i have a son who is four years old. I have been in and out of jobs since he was born but i never stick to a job. I am now studying towards a law degree but i feel like giving up already, i thought it would be for me but i realise now that this is not what i want to do. My dream job would be to join the police force, it is something i have always wanted to do. But if people found out i was joining the police force they would laugh at me. And since having my son i have lost alot of confidence in myself. Would the police force accept me if i tried to get in? Or don't i stand a chance? I just want to do a job that my son will be proud of and something i will enjoy, I just have no faith in myself. Advice is needed, thanks
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male
reader, Sageoldguy1465  +, writes (24 June 2014):
 The key to your whole submittal is this phrase: "...but i never stick to a job...."
Until and unless you can reconcile that - as many/most adults have learned to do - then you may well continue to founder and seek that elusive "perfect job" or "prefect life" forever......
Stick-to-it-ivness is an adult trait.... and you need to learn it....
Good luck....
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 June 2014): You don't mention your son's Dad so I'll assume he's still around and taking an active part in child-rearing. If you're a single Mum, you'll have to base your decisions on what's best for your son and what is practical with regards to child care. Police work involves a lot of unsocial hours.How far are you into your law degree? If it's been a year or less, I think dropping out is worth considering if you're really not happy. If you're more than halfway through the course however and are achieving satisfactory grades it would seem a shame to waste all that time, money and effort and not walk out with a certificate. A formal qualification will put you in the running for more jobs than if you don't have one.Have a think about why you want to quit your degree. If you just hate the course or have lost interest in it, consider asking to switch to another one which might suit you more or deferring your place for a year while you rethink your options. If you're failing miserably (i.e you've been told by the Uni that you're unlikely to get your degree) then it's worth considering not wasting any more of your time. If your grades are acceptable but you feel like you're struggling with the academic side, speak to your tutor for support and guidance. If your thoughts of dropping out are simply a reaction to you having "lost confidence" then you really need to get some counselling for your confidence issues. Simply withdrawing from something because it makes you anxious doesn't help you deal with the anxiety.Police officers do need to be assertive people and deal with all kinds of crap so some assertiveness training may help you realise your goals. You'll have to learn not to take things personally if you're a cop.Don't be too put off by other people's opinions on the matter. I have a friend who was put off the police force as a career by her Dad (who was a cop) saying that she wasn't tough enough and she simply didn't have what it took. So she went to Uni instead and hated it, dropped out and got a job as a Support Officer. She loved it and did so well that her bosses recommended that she join the Force proper and she's just started training. Her dad is still a bit bemused (as he obviously had very fixed ideas about what makes a good cop) but is absolutely delighted!
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A
male
reader, wise-guy +, writes (24 June 2014):
I don't see why the police force wouldn't consider you if you applied. I know from friends that it is a difficult process but they do recruit new people. You're studying a law degree? That's a pretty useful degree to have and it's very respected in the work place. I myself did a law degree and I am a qualified barrister. I think coming from a law background would help you a lot if you wanted to join the police (as an officer you would need to know the criminal justice process, legislation especially PACE (Police and Criminal Evidence Act) and other procedures) No one would laugh at you for wanting to do something you feel you really want to do. What I would do is maybe do a bit of research on what you need to do to apply, maybe talk to your university tutors, especially in the law school. They might know where to point you and might have a few leads for you to look into. Give it a go if it's something you really want to do. And by the way, we all have times when we lack faith in our own abilities (I certainly did, almost walked out of university completely) But you just have to keep going and calm down. Relax. You must have some ability if you were able to get onto a law degree at university (that can be a challenge for some in itself! So you've already achieved something that a lot of people haven't done
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 June 2014): Well I went to law school as well, and it's hard, it's lot of work, lots of sleepless nights, in the beginning there's little money not to mention the school loans you have to repay and having people look down on their noses at you when you mention what you do specially if you're a criminal lawyer like I was, it can be disheartening, but sometimes it 's also rewarding. Depending on the field of law you practice you can make a lot of money... But my advice would be if you don't like it now, just don't go any further, not if you don't like it at least a little, because you won't be happy working 10+ hours a day solving other people's problems,it is tiresome, some clients are a pain in the ass, going to court, reading thousands of pages of files, and if you're noy yet a partner you have to work hard hoping someday it'll happen while doing a lot of ass kissing and still wait wait wait, always studying improving yourself, attending workshops and whatnot so if you really don't like it you'll be miserable. Try to find something that pays decent wages and that you can at least like.
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A
female
reader, heartruleshead +, writes (24 June 2014):
If the police force would be your dream career then go for it! Don't waste your time studying law for 7 years if it's something you don't want to do. Yo u have to do a fitness test for the police force as well as other things. Be prepared to work weekends and nights. You can work your way up the ranks :)
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A
female
reader, sugarplum786  +, writes (24 June 2014):
 Don't quit, not everything is greener on the other side. People say you need job satisfaction, not everyone finds it. I am also a firm believer that you make what you want of a job, ie you either learn and grow from it or move on. You seem to lose interest and cannot hold interest in anything for long. I believe that just might be because you lose interest and confidence in yourself.
I suggest you stick with the legal studies and complete it. You say you want your son to be proud of you. You need to show that you make a decision and you run with it. You are 22. some people at your age are already qualified, some people take a break and start a career later. I am saying that you are not getting younger, the police force looks great and exciting but its just the adventure/excitement that is attracting you to it. Finish your degree and start the articles and if you then decide you want a change , go for it , but you will always have the law degree to back you up should things not work out in the police force. Remember your decisions today affect the future of not just your life but your son, so be smart and don't give up on yourself. Nothing is impossible all you have to do is work hard and have faith.
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A
male
reader, methuselah +, writes (24 June 2014):
Hi, To answer your question about the police force. I would go into your local police station and explain you are interested. They will then be happy to point you in the right direction as to what to do next. You could look on the internet and send an enquiry but I would make the effort of going personally. It is a direct action. Don't go through worrying about what people think! So what if people laugh, (I doubt they will)plan your life the way you would like. Start today, make contact with the police, and also mention you are doing the law degree as well. This obviously helps in being in the police. You may be able to train as a police cadet and also keep the law degree going. Best wishes.
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A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (24 June 2014):
I forgot to add that there are plenty of careers that may not make you rich but are very enjoyable.
My brother is a whale watching captain and gets to spend lots of time on the boat and at the beach, among other things.
Another friend is a biologist and gets to travel to fun places to study behavior and other natural things.
My wife is an apparel designer and makes incredible clothes.
Try looking at trade schools. See if something sparks your interest and go from there.
Btw being a lawyer is not fun either unless you get to be very successful.
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A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (24 June 2014):
While being a cop may be glamorous to some people I don't think it's a particularly enjoyable job and it can be dangerous, especially for women as men tend to feel like they can get the best of them. Women police officers probably get assaulted more as a result (this comes from a friend who is a cop).
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A
male
reader, RevMick +, writes (23 June 2014):
 Hi,
It's ok not to have a career or plan when you're only 22. I get from your post, that you are a bit of a flighty person.
You tend to hop from one thing to another, without having followed through. Again, that's fine. However having children means you put their needs before your own.
So it's time to do what brings in money, whether you like it or not.
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