A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey me and my ex boyfriend have been over for about a month. We were realy good friends before we dated so when it was over we both wanted to be friends still. He broke up with me before but we got back together 2 weeks later. Now its over again. He started texting me last week. We talked about things we used to talk about together and it felt nice. Hes texed me on 5 different days, we talked for over a hour but he was always the one to text me first cuz i wanted to play it cool and i wanted him to miss me cuz i still have feelings for him. But since he's been texting me i feel like i should text him first once in a while maybe? So i was wondering that since he texed me last on monday night that if it would be a good idea for me to text him first on thursady? I realy want to talk to him and i was also wondering why he would ask me if im dating anyone or if i have dated anyone since him? my answers were no though. Thanks for your time and help.
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female
reader, Csquared  +, writes (6 January 2010):
 hi ehm i've always found that with relationships (friendly or intimate)it is better to be honest with people instead of playing games if you want to be his girlfriend again tell him instead of ''playing it cool'' if he doesn't feel the same at least you'll no were you stand and you can move on and if he does then you can take it from there instead of both of you beating round the situation because i guarantee you if you are feeling confused he is feeling twice as confused.
A
female
reader, Dazed~Confused  +, writes (6 January 2010):
 Him texting you may mean that he wants to get back together, and it may not. Ppl often get nostalgic for what they know and what is comfortable. I have no doubt he is missing you, especially as you guys were friends first.
He's asking you if you're dating anyone cause he's curious. Again, it doesn't necessarily mean anything.
Also, you need to ask yourself why he broke up with you. If he was the one that initiated it both times, then obviously there is something that is not working for him. So he may still want to have you around, but it doesn't necessarily mean he wants to get back together.
If you do want to get back with him, I suggest letting him continue to make the first rules. As much as I hate games in relationships, I have found that when it comes to guys, letting them work for it a little bit is what works in the end. Also, don't feel that you need to provide info as to whether or not you are dating anyone or not. It is none of his business.
Whatever you do, don't fall into the trap of sleeping with him. Friends with Benefits with ex's is never a good idea. In the end you will end up with a sexual relationship and nothing more. If he knows he can get it without the commitment, then he won't even try.
As for whether or not to text him on Thursday, I say let him continue to make the first move for the first little while. But, if you find that you want to, then yes send him a little text from time to time. Keep it short and sweet.
Good Luck!
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A
female
reader, girl from bristol  +, writes (6 January 2010):
yes i think you should text him he still has feelings for you
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (6 January 2010):
If it did't work before, it might not work again. It sounds to me like he's keeping you on a leash just in case something else doesn't work out and he needs a comfort blanket. I think you should be looking to move on to be honest.
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A
female
reader, EPIC +, writes (6 January 2010):
Okay firstly ... LOVE YOU! Clearly insane like everyone else ... (in the best BEST way)Secondly .... you say you still have feelins for him and he MAY have some for you (MAY!) so why not not text for a few days then give him a call OR EVEN go see a film ... walk ... whatever ....TALK LIKE WITH REAL WORDS NOT TEXTS ... (that you then analys with your friends (come on you know you do it ... everyone does))Good luck! Sorry for all the brackets X
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