A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I've been flirting with a guy for several months and we finally were able to meet for sex. We have both been eager but nervous to get together, as we are both sort of shy and reserved. It ended up that he could not get it up, but gave me some really great oral sex that has my mind still blown. Now I haven't heard from him in several days except for him to text me that his nerves got the best of him. I texted him a couple of times with limited response, so I stopped. Then he texts me, but not with his usual sexuality. I want to hear the take on this from all the guys. Should I still pursue this guy as I had a REALLY good time or just leave him alone? And how should I handle any further communications initiated by him, as I am trying hard not to be the one to contact him. I am 40 and he's 35 if that means anything.
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male
reader, Paladin +, writes (12 March 2008):
 This has to be one of the worst things that can happen to a guy and yes I have been there. The wierd thing is that it never happened to me with a girl I wasn't that interested in. It only happened when I really liked her and was most concerned about pleasing her. Also, I found that it only happened when there was a lot of teasing going on and months or so of anticpation. I know this may seem crazy but that is what happened. My guess is that he is very interested in you but since his last episode he is probably even more nervous and worried about what will happen. I suggest you not discuss this with him now and more importantly let him know that you are interested in him and when you do get back in bed move slow and step up the foreplay and just let things happen. Unless he has a medical problem I am sure he will eventually rise to the occasion. Sounds like he does want to please you and that is special.
A
male
reader, Uncle Trev  +, writes (12 March 2008):
Meet up with im and talk - ask him what he wants out of the potential relationship if he wants a relationship at all. Once you know what he wants out of it you then know where you stand and can make a better decision from that position.
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A
male
reader, Collaroy  +, writes (11 March 2008):
 Hi,
I have had ths problem in the past. When you meet a girl you really like I found it very hard to get an erection as I was so nervous. As opposed to a one night stand where I was always relaxed and had no problems.
If you really like him, give him another go. Ask him out for a dinner and go from there. You are at the stage in your life where you shouldnt have to worry about being forward, and he is probably so very concerned at the moment as he couldnt satisfy you that night. but give him another chance, and this time take it slowly. I would suggest you first try and get him off orally or with a handjob, that way he will build confidence by getting hard and he'll soon be able to go all the way with you. He needs a bit of guidance to build up his confidence, it's surely worth another go isnt it?
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