A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I have been married for 14 years, my husband is a very caring, loving and great bloke - we unfortunately cannot have children but have spoken about this at length and have decided that we can have a fullfilling and wonderful life just the two of us - we both have neices and nephews, so there are children around. My problem is i have been unfaithful and have been having an affair for the past 10 months - my lover and I have talked at length about moving in together and when we are together it is great.I don;t know what to do - should I leave my husband for this man - what if I stay with my husband and cheat again - he doesn;t deserve that and i don't want to be that person
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 January 2011): What if you leave your husband for this new guy... and then continue to cheat on your new fella?
The man in your life doesn't make you into a cheater. You have to decide who you are and what you expect from yourself. Decide on the morality of your life.
Otherwise, you may wake up one day to a mess that you cannot clean up.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (4 January 2011): You are already that person.Well done,you are officially an adulteress.Why dont you just move in with your lover,divorce your husband & give him his freedom,that way,everyone is happy in the end.Stop wasting his time & yours,get a divorce,because thats probably where your marriage is headed anyway after he finds out,& he will find out,because the truth always come out.Ill see you back here in a few months time,asking a question about divorce.Good luck though,you'll need it
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A
male
reader, Illithid  +, writes (3 January 2011):
 Either you love your husband and decide to honor the vow you made at your wedding, or you love the excitement and newness of this over man and will leave your husband for him. You can't keep both. It's time to choose one or the other, but let me point out that after a while, your new man will get boring too and you'll never stop finding more interesting alternatives. You can jump from man to man if you like, but if you want a long term relationship, your husband is your best bet.
(And have you considered adoption?)
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (3 January 2011):
 "we can have a fullfilling and wonderful life just the two of us" that's just the problem, there is three of you. Give your husband the wonderful gift of freedom to find someone who truly cares for him. Then you can screw whomever you want without any qualms.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (3 January 2011):
The question is why are you having an affair?
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A
female
reader, almc  +, writes (3 January 2011):
Leave him, if he is a great guy then he doesn't need that.
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