A
female
age
41-50,
*emma Johnson
writes: I have been seeing my boyfriend for around 7 months. I have known from the start that he previously had social dating accounts - but has never met or hooked up with people or paid for subscriptions.. He likes to look at profiles, at what is out there and how people advertise themselves, he has no profile pics of himself. I let him know that continuing to log in to these sites bothers me and he has disabled accounts, and the one he hasn't disabled had not been active for around 4 months until recently. I have been so happy and more confident knowing that he isn't looking around but this week found he has been online again and I'm disappointed. I suppose I would like to know am I being unfair? I don't really want him to know I have been checking his activity on this particular site. And I'm confident that he clicked on an automated email delivered to him to check it out. Wish he would just deactivate his account but am not sure how to go about it. I'm not asking for the world but not browsing at singles online makes me a whole lot more comfortable. Should I say something?
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female
reader, rainbowmaker +, writes (10 May 2010):
YES, YES, YES! Say something! I dont agree with his behaviour one bit! he has you so why is he checking singles sites?? Thats just wrong!
The thing is though you obviously dont have alot of trust for your man seeing as you have been spying on him, but isn't it a good thing you did! Now you know what he has been upto!
I would just come right out and confront him, ask him what he's playing at! He was supposed to have left all that behind when the two of you got together. Also it seems you have some mayjor trust issues to think about here! Even if he hasnt any intention of meeting any of these people he's looking at, your lack of trust tells me you may need to rethink this relationship anyway!
A
female
reader, Laura1318 +, writes (10 May 2010):
If it bothers you , you will need to tell him about your feelings.
If you do not tell him , he will not know and he cannot read your mind.
If he loves and respect you , he will stop as he does not want to hurt your feelings.
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A
female
reader, AuntyEm +, writes (10 May 2010):
Internet sites are addictive. He may be just browsing...that is until he sees someone he absolutely cannot resist!! Ive been through this and ended a two and a half year relationship because of it. If he's looking...he isn't commited. You need to let him know it's a massive problem.
Aunty Em xxx
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (10 May 2010):
To be honest, yes I think you should. If he's still on those sites, then he's not totally committed. You deserve either total commitment, or you'll have to let him go. Don't be second best.
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