A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Me and my friends have been hanging around with this group of lads for quite a while now and basically one of them is what you would call the stereotypical bad boy, good looking but he knows it, cocky and is so persuasive and convincing. The thing is Ive kissed him and gone a little further but now he's in the process of trying to get me to have intercourse with him which I've put off twice. I am not naive and I know he's a player who is very good with words but Im still attracted to him. I am not bothered about the whole hook up thing cos we're both single but its just his arrogance and the way he makes me feel guilty but the thing is I want to sleep with him but I dont want him to think "oh that was easy enough." Should I play him at his own game? Tease him and make him chase me? Or am I just being silly and will end up gettin hurt cos I am drawn to him..Any ideas?
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 May 2010): i have a similar problem with my boss! im 17 he's like 10 years older than me, i know he's a sleeze but i can't help but be attracted to him! he keeps making dirty and vulgar comments in work and any time i'd be in on my day off anywhere i go he's right behind me making dirty comments again! lol sure it's all abit of fun but i know im attracted to him but i just wana play him at his own game something shocking, just to piss him off. lead him on when he makes a move turn him down, he's the type to be raging! lol
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 April 2009): I am the girl who wrote this question..To update you Im having 3 of my girl mates around this weekend along with this group of 4 lads, including the 'player' as we get on well on a friend level too..That is the main issue I feel a connection with him when we're alone, I am often shy when talking to lads and I know my friends struggle to talk to this boy but I am so comfortable with him and I think thats why I feel attracted to him.I have decided to take things slowly and try and keep him interested. Letting him chase me and if he moves on then so be it, he wouldnt be worth it in the first place!!
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 April 2009): Don't put yourself in harm's way.
His mindset is "I can have any girl I want."
When I was in high school I HATED hearing guys at the back of the bus talk about how they could get any girl to sleep with them. I so wanted to say "You couldn't get me to sleep with you." They were so cocky and I would think, "Not every girl is in a hurry to have sex."
Be the girl who doesn't give him what he wants.
If you play him at his game, he is going to grow impatient/tired of the game, and say "NEXT!" to the next girl waiting for him.
If you can do this casually, more power to you, but if he actually means something to you, and you KNOW he is a player, don't sleep with him and then end up kicking yourself over and over again for something you KNEW about.
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reader, anonymous, writes (13 April 2009): I fell pregnant with a guy like this. He knew how I felt and took advantage of it. I tried playin hard and that never worked coz he knew id always give in.
Id advice u not to have it with him. Espeacially if he knows how your feelings.
Nithing good will come out of it. Having sex with my guy was the biggest regret. Only good thing that came out of it was my pregnancy - even that's niot good as im 15.
Be safe okay.
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A
female
reader, OSCARS MUMMY +, writes (13 April 2009):
 well if you do end up having sex with him, be sure to remember it would be just sex as far as he is concerned - i doubt from how you describe him there would be any real emotion involved or love. I reckon once he has sex with you (theres nothing to say it will be any good/it may be over very quickly) he will lose his interest in you and move on to his next conquest. If i were you (and i know its easier said than done) - i would keep him as a mate, at least that way he will respect you to some degree. But if you do succumb to his advances make sure you use a condom as it would seem hes been around the block
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A
female
reader, ninetoes  +, writes (13 April 2009):
 I have been in this situation before!
In the end, either having sex with him or playing him back is just giving you a self-esteem boost, which will only be temporary. It feels good to be able to have the bad boy in the palm of your hand, but in the end, the only benefit you get from this is a short lived good feeling.
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reader, anonymous, writes (13 April 2009): First of all, as satindesire said, you are risking your own health by taking a chance to sleep with him, if you do. You are only going to get hurt and risk catching an std. So do NOT sleep with him, or let things go further because you already know the outcome. He is player, and not to be trusted because he knows how to talk to women. You are not naive, and smart enough to put off having sex with him. He doesn't care about you, and just wants you for sex.You are worth more than a piece of a chess game he is trying to conquer, and the best thing you can do is to stay away from him. This means you are showing him that you are not falling for his game. There are better guys out there, and he doesn't respect you at all. He can play the game by himself, and you can be safe rather than sorry.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 April 2009): If I was you, I would stay clear because it sounds like he's after one thing. Although...you could try playing him like you think...and see what happens. If all fails, I would keep clear.
Hope this helps!
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