A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I caught my husband jacking off to internet porn. This makes my so insecure about us. Should it?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2007): I have dealt with this for over 36 years. I wish I had put a stop to it long ago by just leaving. I have always been a faithful wife but now think about having an affair just to stop my frustration but I almost feel like I am too old. He has made me feel unwanted, unloved, ugly and fat (I am not any of those).... I am nice looking for my age (no grey hair) and between thin and average weight.
The whole problem is that I LOVE HIM!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 May 2007): its okay for him to masterbate its healthy for him,and who cares everyone has hormones
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 May 2007): I caught my husband masterbating to internet porn on our 1st wedding anniversary only a few weeks ago. Our sex life was non existant - Yes I was shocked, hurt, angry, tried to see the funny side, but I am now untrusting and don't sleep very well. We went to an initial counselling consultation which I initiated - divorce or counselling, but he said he won't go to anymore - the reason??? I think is that he has alot of problems, but I feel that this can of worms needs to be opened - if we are to benefit and have a happy and fulfilling marriage. I completly understand where you are coming from! But as so many other people have said - it's masterbation - which is what my Hubby said, so i bought him some porn magazines to hopefully keep him off the net, as it is too interactive for my liking - especially when it comes to certain types of porn. I wish you well and hope that this situation doesn't destroy you, as what doesn't break you - makes you stronger
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 May 2007): Buy some female porn magazines with naked well-endowed men hunks and see if he likes to see you avidly studying them "for interest, to see if you can get out of it what he does". I think his manhood will shrivel into his underpants when he sees you admiring those very well endowed men and he will feel first-hand what it is like to feel inadequate. It is not a terrible thing he has done unless he is addicted to it but I get sick and tired of everyone saying that boys will be boys and they never have to really feel like we do sometimes. When they are treated as they treat us they absolutely hate it and I think that speaks volumes.
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A
female
reader, penta +, writes (16 May 2007):
 Well, first off, he should find his porn in other venues. Internet porn is notorious for downloading all kinds of malware, adware, and just plain viruses. You'll get nasty popups if he's not careful.
That said, I don't think porn itself is a problem, unless he prefers it to you. Men like to masturbate. Men like to look at naked women. It's normal. These women aren't "real" -- he's never going to get them. As long as you and he have a satisfying sex life, then I would ignore his porn.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 May 2007): talk to him about it, tell him what you feel and how he makes you feel when he does that. I told my boyfreind straight out how it made me feel when he watched other woman, it made me feel not good enough and it made me feel like that becuase i didnt look like those woman he watched he wouldnt love me as much. He stoped becuase he loves me and if your husband loves you he will stop, just speak up and tell him whats on your mind.
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A
female
reader, love-him  +, writes (13 May 2007):
 hey chick, porn is one thing that many men become 'obsesed' with and many men believe it ok. there is no need to be worried, hey think of it this way, he isnt ever gonna get them all he has and will most likely want is you... dont worry about it, and if it bothers you that much, tell him and ask him to not do it, as it bothers you so much, maybe explain why? i hope i helped, mail me if u wan 2 x x x
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A
female
reader, Country Woman +, writes (13 May 2007):
 Well unfortunately porn on the internet is very easy to access so it is very common place these days for a lot of men.
How is your sex life with your husband? Do you have sex very often and is it enjoyable when you do?
Does he want sex more often than you are happy with?
Years ago you had magazines in brown paper bags and men going into newsagents to ask for them off the top shelf well the internet has stopped that now.
How did your husband react when you caught him, was he very embarrassed or did he just shrug it off as nothing?
Men do have to relieve themselves as do women but men do think about sex a lot more than women.
You do need to talk about this though as he could be doing this instead of pestering you for sex and it is a normal function of a man but it all depends on what he is watching and whether he wants you to do the same as what he is watching.
Some men do become obsessed with watching internet porn and find it quicker and easier than having sex with their partner and it can make them want to try different things with their partner that they may not feel comfortable doing.
You do need to talk to one another and ask him about it and tell him how you feel and your insecurities.
Don't over react at the first stage though that is all I am saying.
I wouldn't say he is behaving like a child though, he is a man with normal needs.
You do need to know though whether this is an addiction or an adhoc thing but I would want to know how often he does it so it could be something for counselling if it becomes a big problem between the two of you ok.
Wish you well.
BFN
Country Woman
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A
male
reader, kenny +, writes (13 May 2007):
 I agree with rhythmandblues2, this is an insult to you. What is he thinking carrying out acts like this while you are in the other room. I would nip this in the bud as soon as possible, talk to him, express how disgusted you are and it has got to stop immediately. Failing this pull the thing out of the wall, or get in touch with your service privider and get them to put a block on porn sites.
Good luck x
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 May 2007): This behavior is an insult to you....there you are in the other room and he is jacking off to porn on the internet. How old is he 13? Tell him you don't like it, nor do you appreciate it, it is rude and childish and to please grow up or get help with his addiction to porn....what a waste of time and of a life, please..............
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