A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:hallo, I'm kind of confused. I have a gal for four years now and it seems each year, she has an affair and call me lucky but I always find out about it. well, now it's a couple of weeks into the year and I happen to have the password to her email and there are some really disturbing pix there. she is grooving with some guy who happens to be a friend of mine. I forgave her the last couple of years but now I think it's becoming some sort of trend or I'm encouraging it by forgiving her. Should I break up with her or should I forgive her again?
View related questions:
affair Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, beckski  +, writes (9 January 2009):
 If i was you i would get rid of your girlfriend it seems she thinks that she can get away with sleeping with other people while shes with you.
Also if he was a friend he wouldnt do that to you at all.
Theres better people out there just keep looking.
Hope this helps x
A
male
reader, roadman +, writes (9 January 2009):
 Also remember safe sex and safety belts..:-)
Its not about catching anythiing,send her for some test b4 you go back to bed with her....I would
...............................
A
male
reader, Andrew83 +, writes (9 January 2009):
 Ok, first of all no partner should cheat if there's love from both sides.
As for you and your partner well it's that time, bells are ringing and the fight is over. She should have learnt from the 1st time you forgave her but it's very clear she's too stupid doing it again and again and again and yes your encouraging her by forgiving her each time for it but she should have known better from the start and after the 1st time she was forgiven. It isnt as much your fault as it is her's. I can see you love her but theres no love from her side unless she's showing love to you by cheating.
Tell her by txt, phone call or face to face it's over and tell her why your doing this. As much as you want to let her off once again it will be better this way. Ask yourself is it worth being with someone who is cheating after being forgiven for all the time.. I bet it's hurt you each time she did it so why keep on being hurt.
Call it off, take time out for yourself and when ready meet someone who aint going to do the same thing.
Take the advice given from every answer thats been posted here and think to yourself whether you want this to keep happening, how much is enough, do you see her love for you and are you happy with the relationship.
Also, keep us updated on how things go/progress.
...............................
A
male
reader, roadman +, writes (9 January 2009):
If you love her,then continue and get on with her bad habits...If she keeps coming back to you everytime then clearly you have something more than the other guys..I've had woman like this who find it hard to keep there legs shut,its not nice but you get use to it,try having fling yourself...and show her 2 can play that game..You have to really dig inside yourself and see how much the girl really means to you and how much you vaule your connection rather than your sex life.Your girl friend may get depressed from time to time and seek fun to cheer up or your not doing enough to keep her happy,or shes just taking what she can get while its on offer and forfilling her desires..Its all about what your willing to put up with in a woman and how much her company means to you..
...............................
A
male
reader, Peterk5699 +, writes (9 January 2009):
 2 words: Break up. She'll only continue to do it again and again. You deserve better.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 January 2009): You absolutely should not forgive her if she has cheated on you. Are you 100% sure she has cheated, or was it just innocent flirting? I don't know what you mean by disturbing pics. But if they are that disturbing, you need to get out now. She is just not the faithful type and you deserve so much better my friend. You could really find a girl that wants to be faithful and love you to pieces like you deserve.
...............................
A
female
reader, Tisha-1  +, writes (9 January 2009):
 If the trust is shattered, there's no point in going on. I can see how your life with her is going to go. Every year, a new fling. Is that really what you want?
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (9 January 2009): I think you know the answer to your question. Don't beat yourself up over someone like that... go find yourself a girl that respects you.
...............................
A
male
reader, PeterPan +, writes (9 January 2009):
 I definitely think it's time to cut her loose. It's obvious that she's not as committed to you as you seem to be to her. Simply forgetting that this is your girlfriend for a moment, would you be as forgiving with a friend (of either sex) if they were consistently abusing your friendship? I would hope not... I think that I would have been gone after the second discovery. I can see possibly forgiving one incident... second? ...maybe... but the fourth? -- never!
...............................
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (9 January 2009):
 Wow, she's got pictures of herself and a friend of yours on her computer having sex?
Honestly, she doesn't have any respect for you, and you by letting her do that, to you, over and over and over, you have no respect for yourself either.
Drop her. You are enabling her cheating and you are the one getting hurt by it.
A relationship without love, respect and trust is really not worth a whole lot is it?
Don't you think you deserve a woman who treats you right?
...............................
A
female
reader, doesntunderstand +, writes (9 January 2009):
I would leave her. It seems to me that she is doing it because you forgive her...she has no real consequences to her actions. Who will it be next year? Your brother?
...............................
|
